Thursday, September 4, 2008

Noone Gives A Fuck About Your Fantasy Football Team...

...and yet i'll be writing about mine again this year. why? because that's what nerds do. and sadly, i am one of them.

The NFL season kicks off tonight, which means nothing to me. it takes about 3 or 4 weeks before i start to really give a shit about Pro Football. the euphoria of college football's return is still too high for me to focus on the pros. plus it takes about that many weeks to get my drinkin' under control, so that i'm not too hungover to enjoy the games played on Sundays. Also, it's really fucking hard to give a shit about the NFL when your team is easily one of the worst franchises in the league.

one thing that does get me at least checking the stat line is my fantasy football team. and with the shitty season the Falcons are going to have, the Thug Apologists might be all i have to root for in 2008.

My team is lead this season by the two headed QB beast of douchebaggery by the names of Tony Romo and Brett Favre. can you just imagine the epic disappointment these two dickwads are gonna bring me this year? the possibilities seem endless.

my backfield is not nearly as impressive as last year's (Addai and Purple Jesus), we've got a true thug in Jamall Lewis...let's just hope his old ass doesn't hit the wall this season, being that he plays for the Browns though the chances are always good. if you don't think Lewis is washed up enough for you then i can raise you Fred Taylor. what'chu think 'bout dat? if you like injury risks then we've got Deuce for your ass. and if you've got Purple Jesus this season, we'll be using Chester Taylor whenever Peterson misses his mandatory 2 games. but it ain't about the veterans for the Thug Apologists. youth is the name...and we got 3 rookies who could all be big timers for us this year, headlined by Darren McFadden and complimented by Steve Slaton and Rashard Mendenhall...both of whom will likely be starters at some point for their teams this season.

the receiving corp has gotten a major upgrade for this season. T.O. leads the way and Roy Williams is our number 2. Chris Chambers adds some depth and if healthy isn't a factor we've got the best tight end in football with Antonio Gates.

we took the safe pick with the Patriots Defense. let's just hope this isn't the season when the wheels finally fall off. that's a lot of old legs back there.

and so there you go, the 2008 Thug Apologists. i don't even like any of these players other than i guess our team must be good. this group is a total boom or bust fantasy team if there ever was one. let the shit talking and the gay jokes begin. Fantasy Football starts tonight bitches!

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