Monday, May 4, 2009
Listening to Mike Wilbon's Mouthhole Noises Makes My Angry Brain Hurt
is there a more dismissive full of himself jerk at ESPN than Mike Wilbon? i mean sure, Skip Bayles is an unbearable cocksucker who once accused Troy Aikmen of being gay to help sell a book he wrote and Chris Berman is a clueless tool who ruins everything he touches; but Wilbon is such a smug, unlikeable asshole that whenever i hear him speak it makes me want to smash my overpriced television and start writing 100,000 word manifestos of hatred to the PTI inbox. listening to him call Atlanta the Worst Sports Town In America (a claim to is so bullshit that i don't even feel like commenting on it) and say he was mad that he couldn't watch Dwayne Wade play anymore (seriously, you are such a homer for any person who was ever born in the city of Chicago that you'd think he was the mayor or something) was another reminder that i wish i had the power to make people's heads explode like in Scanners.
top 7 reasons i hate Mike Wilbon
1. he's a fucking jerk
2. he has an obvious disdain for the common sports fan
3. he's a shameless name dropper of his celebrity friends
4. he's such a homer for all things chicago that it makes Kornheiser's obsession with stars and north eastern sports seem well rounded in comparison.
5. he is the prototypical out of touch older man who hates all things new (blogs, MMA, youth culture in general) to the point that he can't be objective in the slightest when discussing them.
6. for that Sean Taylor stuff and his refusal to apologize afterwards
7. when he tries to talk about college football a puppy dies