Friday, May 22, 2009

Worst Uniforms In College Football (14-25)

14. Army Camo

there are so many things wrong with this that i can't even formulate my thoughts into words. it's like if GI Joe had a football team. our armed forces deserve better.

15. Georgia Tech

what is up with the Yellow Jackets and ugly unis? they seem to change their uniforms every single season and with each year they grow uglier and uglier. last season they decided on this butter colored disaster. you're the yellow jackets...keep it simple. go black jersey with yellow numbers and white pants with yellow and black stripes...then use the classic white helmet with the yellow GT.

16. The Black Out Jersey (Utah, Middle Tennessee State, UGA, etc...)

as an Auburn fan it should come as no surprise that i hate a motherfucking blackout jersey...but it's not just because i hated watching Georgia Soulja Boy all over Auburn's ass in them, i also think they make teams look like they are in highschool. it's a lame gimmick that's all about selling another jersey to the fans. alternate uniforms in general are something i could do without, the blackout jersey is just another part of that. even worse are the teams who don't even have black as a primary part of their team colors who decide a blackout is the way to go (Middle Tennessee State and Utah being the worst offenders).

17. San Jose State

for this entire decade the Spartans uniforms have been an ever evolving parade of suck. but really, what the hell are you gonna do with that color combination anyways? you know when you are watching a football movie with fake teams and they always have retarded looking uniforms that no team would ever really wear? yeah well that's San Jose State in a nutshell.

18. Northwestern

purple strikes again. monochromatic purple unis = teh suck. only pimp ass looking old black men on their way to church can or Chuck Bass can rock an all purple outfit...Northwestern football is neither of those things.

19. UAB

when i see UAB's uniforms the first thing that jumps into my mind is early 90s expansion team designs or the old World League. plus who can take that dragon seriously? not even the most ironic hipster in the world could rock a UAB t-shirt and feel good about themselves.

20. Texas Tech

i honestly feel like the Red Raiders uniforms tell the story of a program who is built to develop QBs for the Arena League or the CFL.

21. Tulsa

i can't really put my finger on exactly what i hate about Tulsa's uniforms...maybe it's that they are called the Golden Hurricanes and that hurricanes are neither golden nor do they take place in the state of Oklahoma. and that FONT...will you look at that fucking font! what is that?!

22. Syracuse (Orange Crush)

of the many crimes that Greg Robinson committed against the once proud Syracuse football program, the one that is probably most underrated and yet no less horrifying was allowing the Orangemen to take the field in these Day-Glo Abortions.

23. Hawaii

seriously there must be some rule that says if you're offense is based on throwing the ball 90% of the time then you have to wear mostly black uniforms. i liked Hawaii's uniforms better when they had big rainbows on the sides of their helmets.

24. San Diego State

i've run out of witty shit to say. these just fucking suck. plain and simple. these uniforms are ugly and they look stupid and just thrown together. again it's another team who makes me think High School team when i see them on TV.

25. Minnesota

for a team that's basically had the same uniform for decades you'd think they would have some classic icon design that they wouldn't even think of changing...and yet the Gophers take the field every year decked out in these things and they are totally ok with it. mediocrity reigns supreme. no wonder the Walshes moved to Beverly Hills.


kenniebloggins said...

I'm really glad Wyoming made the list. They would be pretty high up there on mine, too. Also, MTSU wins the worst of the blackout unis because the fans didn't even really recognize the blackout and they chose a Tuesday night game against FAU to go with the black. And what is that mascot they got, a goat wearing an upside down ice cream cone on its head, doing even trying to act like a unicorn?

Philip Arnold said...

Going to have to disagree with you about Army's uniforms, I thought they looked pretty sharp. Plus instead of the player's surname on the jersey it says "Duty, Honor, Country" and the different unit patches on the front, pretty cool shit man.