It's His Town Now

enjoy this clip while you can before MLB comes in yanks it off youtube (which will probably be by the end of the day). Jason Heyward in his first Major League at bat totally crushed it.

The Future is NOW

Jason Fucking Heyward...aka the reason i will be actually watching the Braves this season with some pure excitement behind it instead of out of habit.

GO BRAVES!!!

Braves Baseball, Am I Falling In Love With You Again?

excuse the racist imagery...it's still my fav Braves logo...it conflicts with my liberal leanings, then again so does my love of Charles Bronson movies.

anyways i am pumped as hell for the baseball season for the first time in like a decade. i am giving the credit to Jason Heyward.

Glenn Hubbard. Snake Master.

BEST BASEBALL CARD EVER!!!!!!!|!|

this is so fucking awesome that i can't do this pic justice with silly words. bask in all it's glory. Glenn Fucking Hubbard.

1 more year for Bobby

so Bobby Cox announced today that next season is gonna be his last season as the manager of the Atlanta Braves. the Braves should be a contender next season with one of the National League's best pitching staffs and a team that seems like it's finally getting it's shit together after a couple of lousy seasons. if Atlanta can find a bat or two then i might even call them the favorite to win the NL East. it will be weird to think of Atlanta without Cox in the dugout considering he helped turn the Braves from one of the laughing stocks of all of baseball into one of the best organizations in all of sports. he may have only won 1 world series, but that's still more than the Cubs have (and most teams outside of the Mega-Markets like New York, LA, & Boston). his streak of divisional titles will probably never ever be matched and he's a hall of famer...but part of me wishes he'd go ahead and call it quits this year. i mean YES a guy like Cox who has done so much for his team should be aloud to choose his own exit and not be forced out of town like Joe Torre...but at the same time i think some new blood might be the thing that Atlanta needs to be a Championship team. with next season being Cox's LAST SEASON, the pressure is gonna be on the Braves to send him out a winner...or at least with a playoff trip. it worries me that it might be the sort of thing that could crush them next year.

anyways, next season should at least be an interesting one for the Braves.

ROID SOX (that's just too easy)

sometimes a story just brightens your day.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

whatever, i know everyone was cheating in the last 15 years or whatever...probably some of the Braves too (i'm looking at your David Justice and Gary Sheffield), but having the 2 players most responsible for the Red Sox rise to power linked to positive tests all the way back in 03 BEFORE they ever won a title....well when you are as obnoxious as the Red Sox fans are you kind of deserve this news. also don't forget Johnny Damon has seen his name whispered as being an x-roider too. the only thing that could make this any sweeter is if they found out that douchebag Curt Schilling was on the juice.

THE WISDOM OF KENNY POWERS

i watched Season 1 of EAST BOUND & DOWN. the tragic story of former Atlanta pitcher Kenny Powers. best fucking show ever.

it's got everything.

comedy


drama


and wisdom.....so much fucking wisdom


"Undaunted, I knew the game was mine to win. Just like in life, all of my successes depend on me. I'm the man who has the ball, I'm the man who can throw it faster than fuck. So that is why I am better than everyone in the world. Kiss my ass and suck my dick. Everyone."

Fucking Phillies Need to Quit All This Winning Bullshit

So the Braves picked a really crappy time to get hot as the Phillies refuse to lose any games whatsoever. Atlanta has climbed into 2nd place in the NL East but that's pretty much like being the tallest midget.

Atlanta needs to resign Kenny Fucking Powers and they need to do it quick.

He's Your Problem Now, New York

so i am gonna just go ahead and say it. Frank Wren totally just pulled a motherfucking Jedi Mind Trick on the New York Mets.


"You want our strikeout prone slumping right fielder to create a blackhole in your lineup that keeps you from getting into the playoffs."


"We want your strikeout prone slumping right fielder to create a blackhole in our lineup that keeps us from getting into the playoffs."

so what if Atlanta got the Mets version of Jeff Francoeur in exchange...at least he's finally gone.

truly though, that's gotta be the strangest trade in Atlanta Braves history.

Are the Braves Making A Run?

this was supposed to be the point of the season that killed Atlanta. series vs the Yankees, The Red Sox (twice), and The Phillies were gonna bury any chance the Braves had at the division and turn them into sellers at the trade deadline...and somehow someway they find themselves just 2 games behind Philadelphia after sweeping them in 3 straight. WTF? Atlanta is 6-4 in their last 10 and has a 4 game win streak and is heading into a weekend series with the worst team in baseball, The Washington Nationals.

The Phils on the other hand start a series against the Mets who aren't exactly on a hot streak lately. and to be honest neither of those teams looks built to win shit, their pitching staffs are both weaker than Atlanta's (esp with rookie superstar Tommy Hanson exceeding every one's expectations so far). The Marlins look like the Braves' real competition by virtue of having a young team with some good pitching and some solid bats in the order. and that's Atlanta's real problem...they may have the top pitching staff in the NL East right now, but hitting wise they are 4th and some nights 5th in the division. McClouth, McCann, and Chipper are the only guys you can really trust in that order and Garrett Anderson has decided to finally show up to a few games now and again and Matt Diaz does what he can. Escobar continues to show flashed that he might someday be a great players mixed in with moments where you wish that raft he came to on from Cuba might have been eaten by sharks instead.

i don't really know what to think about Atlanta's recent climb in the standings...mostly it just tells me that the NL East is a fucking joke and the only way the Braves are making the playoffs is to win this shitty division outright. but honestly, can you tell me that they don't have a chance? i don't think so.

LSU wins another freaking championship in something

so yesterday while i was watching LSU pound the living shit out of Texas in the College World Series to claim their 6th National Title (SEC! SEC! SEC!) i saw that the star of LSU's team in none other than wide receiver Jared Mitchell.

Mitchell was named MVP of the tournament and seemingly destroyed Texas single handed, yesterday. Mitchell was also a member of the 2007 LSU Football team that won the BCS title...so that makes this kid a national champ in two different team sports. has that ever happened before? i mean i'm sure it has as there are often role players from the football team that play on college baseball teams, but i honestly can't think of anyone who comes to mind. oh yeah, Mitchell also was a 1st round draft pick by the Chicago White Sox....it's like Rod Stewart says, "Some guys have all the luck."

THE FUTURE IS NOW, MOTHERFUCKER

so, that Tommy Hanson kid is kinda good.

someone needs to teach him proper beard growing techniques though.

THE WORST BRAVE EVER

Braves & Birds has a good post about the blackhole of suck that is Jeff Francoeur. i 100% agree that the only reason he takes up a roster spot is because he's handsome, white, and from the Atlanta area. if his name was El' Jeff Martinez of Panama then he would've been stuck back on a banana boat and sent off into the Atlantic ocean to be eaten by sea birds.

sometimes when i watch him at the plate i am pretty sure i could strike him out with my 62 mile an hour fastball by just throwing it directly into the dirt or 4 feet outside every single pitch.

Karma is a Bitch

so Tom Glavine has spoken out about getting cut by the Braves and says he feels like he was "betrayed" by the franchise and blah blah fucking blah.

you mean like that time when you were still worth a shit and took the money and ran to a fucking divisional rival? that kind of betrayed?

yeah screw you, Tom. you aren't John Smoltz and anyone who thinks the Braves made a stupid mistake letting Glavine go are either stuck in the 90s or don't /doesn't live in reality. Glavine said that a couple of teams are interested in him, let's hope one of those happens to be the Phillies so he can bring his 80 mile an hour fastball into the Ted and get lit up by the Braves.

in other positive Braves news: word on the street is that a deal is cooking between the Braves and the Red Sox that would finally rid Atlanta of useless/overrated Jeff Francoeur!!! in exchange for veteran pitcher Brad Penny (5-1 on the year). obviously if Penny could be added to the starting rotation then The Braves could move Kenshin Kawakami back to the bullpen (along with recently moved Kris Medlen) giving Atlanta some more strength in the pen and improving an already solid starting rotation. i'm sure the Gwinnett County/Parkview fans will be sad that their hero is being sent off to New England...but as an actual Braves fan nothing could make me happier. i always assumed the best thing Atlanta would be able to get for Frenchy would be a bag of balls and a sack of nickles...the chance that the Braves could add an actual major leaguer to help out the team makes this a no-brainer type deal to me.

It Must Be Braves Day Or Something

right after letting Tom Glavine go the Atlanta Braves made a huge trade and acquired Pirates outfielder Nate McLouth. and all they had to give up is minor league prospects, outfielder Gorkys Hernandez and pitcher Charlie Morton...neither of who were likely to join the club this season. i'm not even gonna pretend i know much about McLouth but i do know he won a Gold Glove last season. he was also an All Star last year for Pittsburgh and i do remember the awesome throw he made in the 10th get out the potential game winning run. he lead the NL in doubles last season and he's 57 for 62 in steals...so he adds an instand speed threat and a legit leadoff man to the Braves lineup. he's also got some power with 9 homers this season (more than anyone on Atlanta) and a .470 slugging %. best of all he's only 27 years old and he's just beginning a 4 year deal, so no need to worry about him leaving town via free agency next season. besides bringing in Derek Lowe, this is the best move the Braves have made this season. now if only they could get rid of Francoeur.... but seriously with Mclouth hitting leadoff and Escobar 2nd, Atlanta finally has some guys for Chipper and McCann to drive in.


even bigger news to me is the fact that Atlanta is moving Kris Medlen into the bullpen and calling up Mr. Future Cy Young winner Tommy Hanson to make his major league debut on Saturday. this is some exciting shit! The Braves haven'y had a pitching prospect this well thought of in years and he should be able to sure up that final rotation spot giving Atlanta 5 dependable and respectable starters and some more strength in the pen with Medlen moving back. the biggest question is what to do with Tim Hudson when he comes back...but i guess that's a problem worth having.

with this new and improved lineup and the solid staff i don't see why Atlanta can't win the division or at least get a Wild Card. just when i give the Braves up for dead they suck me back again. yay BASEBALL interest! something to do while i wait for Fall.

Adios Senor Glavine

i guess the Braves got tired of waiting for Tom Glavine to just give up the ghost and retire, so today Atlanta cut the future Hall Of Famer. apparently Glavine still thinks he can pitch and is gonna be looking for another team to join. i could honestly care less, i thought it was stupid that they brought him back this season anyways and with the pitching staff the Braves have right now (plus the prospects they have in AAA) it seemed pretty pointless to keep him.

i hope he realizes that he's better off just retiring and finding himself a nice job at TBS or ESPN but something tells me he'll end up pitching for the Phillies or some other NL team desperate for an arm...whatever, i've got no love for Glavine. he's no Smoltz and he left the Braves for the Mets when we still could've used him...this is just some baseball Karma coming around on his ass.

all that being said, thanks for giving us the World Series title in '95 and for helping build a winner. when you go into the Hall it'll be as a Braves legend.

Just Say No To Jo-Jo

Okay, I'm done with Jo-Jo Reyes. Dude is completely useless, can't win a fucking game, can't get anyone out, he can't give you more than 5 innings and taxes the bullpen, & is overall the worst Braves starting pitcher in years. Why he's taking up that 5th spot in the rotation when the Braves have 3 or 4 quality youngsters in Triple A is beyond me. It's time to trade him, I realize his value is next to nothing but i'd be willing to take a sack of Krystals and season 1 of Battle Star Galactica in exchange for never having to witness one of his pitching abortions again. Besides it's time to give that Tommy Hanson kid a shot, it would at the very least get some fans out to the park to see the Future of the franchise pitch. But really, why the fuck is Jo-Jo still getting chances? My only guess is that Bobby Cox is holding out hope that Tom Glavine is gonna be ready by the end of May...but to me Glavine isn't any kind of answer. Give one of the young guns a shot, Bobby. Quit living in the 90s.

Top 5 Favorite MLB Unis Of All Time

excluding the New York Yankees who easily have the greatest uniform in MLB history (it sucks, but it's true) these are my own personal favorite uniforms in baseball history.

1. KC ROYALS Powder Blues


2. ATLANTA BRAVES 72-80



3. Montreal Expos Original Unis


4. Milwaukee Brewers 1978-1993


5. Chicago White Sox sometime in the 90s-current

The Art Of Not Just Hacking At Everything Like An Idiot

i just read this excellent article on ESPN.com about plate discipline that compares and contrasts Chipper Jones and Jeff Francoeur of the Atlanta Braves and why one of them is awesome (Chipper) and the other is a waste of talent (Jeff) that is maybe/finally/but probably is not turning it around as a hitter.

Time To Fire Bobby Cox?

the man is an ICON of Atlanta sports. he helped turn what was once the laughing stock of the National League into THE TEAM of the 90s (other than the fucking Yankees!)...but over the past couple of seasons, and this one in particular, i just don't think Bobby is the man for the job anymore. i'd really hoped he was gonna retire after last season, but i think because of the Braves playing so poorly he wanted to come back again this year and turn it around. going into this year Atlanta looked to have it's strongest team in years. the pitching staff was rebuilt, the bullpen appeared to be solid, and the line up (although not scary at all) was somewhat respectable with Kelly Johnson, Chipper Jones, and Brian McCann. but here we are, a month into the season, and the Atlanta Braves find themselves hovering around .500 and not looking like a playoff contender at all.

the starting pitching has been solid but the fucking bullpen has had trouble keeping games close and the lineup that Bobby trots out there every night can't produce runs. some of this has been bad luck, McCann's eye issues are something noone can control and because of his absence Chipper has become a non-factor because noone will pitch to him. Garrett Anderson has so far been a total bust, leaving left field the same useless hole that it's been for the past 5 seasons.

but even with the injuries and lack of production from players, it's the Braves lineup that has most fans confused and frustrated. WHY in the Hell does Bobby have Kelly Johnson batting leadoff when he's been the Braves best power threat this season? Why is Casey Kotchman hitting cleanup when the guy has NO POWER WHATSOEVER? all he's doing is eliminating the threat of Chipper. why is Jordan Shafer STILL batting 8th? why aren't the Braves trying to play small ball and manufacture some runs? why have they only stolen 4 FUCKING BASES ALL SEASON? dude, Ron Gant and Fred McGriff aren't walking through that door. Make some changes goddamnit! what you are putting out there every night isn't producing results. a Little League coach could put together a better lineup than Bobby. something needs to happen quick or this season will be over by the end of May.

I love and respect Bobby Cox to death but i'm getting the feeling that he just has no idea what he is doing anymore OR even worse he's so fucking set in his ways that he refuses to make adjustments. the 90s are fucking over, the Braves are just another team now...stop protecting sacred cows. it's time to let Bobby Cox go and see what someone else can do.