Suicide Watch Week 11

and here we are. part 1 of the two part rival war. my beloved Tigers are rolling into my home town of Athens, GA to play the hated Georgia bulldogs in the biggest game of the college football weekend. Georgia sits in the top 10 basically by knocking off an overrated Florida team that can't play any defense. Georgia has been wildly inconsistent this year, flashing signs of brilliance in big games against Bama and Florida and then turning around and looking like total trash against South Carolina and then just being run off the field by a fairly sorry Tennessee squad. the Bulldog nation of course has no time for facts and reality. there in the top 10 and going to the SEC title game and Knowshon Moreno is the greatest runningback in the country. fuck reality. it has no place in the Classic City. well here's some motherfucking reality for your ass. Auburn has the best defence in the SEC and has already shut down the best backfield in the nation in Darren McFadden and Felix Jones, and also beat that same Florida team in the swamp when they were still healthy. am i worried about the Dawgs this week? sure, it's a rivalry game...plus every asshole i know is a fucking Georgia fan and after the ass whipping UGA put on Auburn last season i don't think i can deal with another year's worth of shit talking (seriously if Auburn loses this game i might move) but the beauty of this rivalry has always been that the road team almost always wins. and last time i checked my Tigers are wearing white on Saturday.

Georgia's defence is young and mostly worthless this year. they gave up 34 points to Troy and 35 to Tennessee. Georgia hasn't really looked that impressive except against Oklahoma State and Mississippi. they almost lost to Vanderbilt and they caught a Florida team that was trapped in some time warp and believed that Knowshon Moreno was actually Herschel Walker and that it was 1982, not 2007. Georgia's offence is basically run it with #24 and hope that Mikey Henderson can get them good field position off kick and punt returns and then trow the occasional bomb with Stafford.

will Auburn roll into Athens and crush the Bulldogs like was done to them last year? probably not. actually it's highly unlikely considering Auburn pretty much has the worst offence in the SEC...except when playing LSU. but the Auburn D should be able to take away the Georgia running game and that puts things into the hands of Rex Grossman in training, Matt Stafford...and i like those odds.

okay, with the massive amount of shit i just talked about the Dawgs don't be surprised if they come out and blow Auburn out by about 40 points, causing Tubberville to take the Texas A&M job right then and there so as never to face another Georgia team ever again. but really this is the game that matters the most to me. Auburn has beaten Bama five years in a row. they are sorta due a win by now. but to beat Georgia and ruin their chances at a BCS and SEC title game like they did to Auburn last year....well that's the sort of revenge that can warm your heart and make sitting through the Peach Bowl against a lousy ACC team all that more enjoyable.

potential for tragedy: 7 (rivalry games are always high...but i still love Auburn's chances)

method of suicide: drowning, as in drowning in your fucking sorrows and then leaping off a bridge....if you can find a body of water worth drowning in...fucking drought.