GREATEST IRON BOWL EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

well that turned out pretty good.

BEST COMEBACK WIN I CAN EVER REMEMBER.

BEST IRON BOWL WIN FOR AUBURN THAT I CAN REMEMBER.

CAM NEWTON IS A GOLDEN GOD.

now i am getting fucking wasted.

Hey, who is Auburn playing this week anyways?

so you may or may not have heard this 800 times the last week or so, but for the 3rd time in a row the Iron Bowl will feature an undefeated national title contending school from the great state of Alabama...yet this time it's the boys in blue who wear the target on their chest. Auburn comes into the game needing just two wins to get to Arizona...that's it. a 2 game season. they are lead by an unstoppable QB crippling in Nick Fairly, a tandem of talented runningbacks, a senior offensive line, and the best player to put on the AU helmet since Pat Dye was paying Bo Jackson. THIS IS THE REASON WE LOVE COLLEGE FOOTBALL. An Iron Bowl for the ages.

i will admit that i DO wish Bama hadn't lost to LSU and that this game was for EVERYTHING for both teams, but i guess it's comforting that at worst the Tigers will be able to play for the SEC Championship and a trip to the Sugar Bowl (likely to face off against Ohio State).

Apologies for the early mockery. Too much time on my hands of late has me turning on my own kind...but if you hadn't figured out in 3 years that I am an asshole then you weren't paying attention.

*it should be noted that I was kidding. I DO think this shirt is funny...but I also hate it when people wear shit like this. But duh! I'm fucking cool. Cool kids are too cool for this kinda thing (please take that as a joke).

somewhere someone is yelling "SEC Speed!"

sadly Matt Saracen couldn't lead the Dillon Panthers to a title.

instead he was killed by a wild elephant.

Suicide Watch (2010), Iron Bowl

take that national title shot and shove it down their fucking throats!

War Eagle, Motherfucker.

Iron Bowl Week

a reminder

The Tide Is Coming...

ROLL TIDE 4EVAH

Uber Douche Tide Fan Alert!



now Ricky is the true star of the show for his borderline psycho behavior and for his use of N-Bombs (which is always a bad idea when something ends up on the internet), but my very favorite moment of this video is the girl who says "Motherfucker, god dang!" Jesus thanks you for that one little missy.

"HORSESHIT!! GODDAMN HORSESHIT!!"

via Every Day Should Be Saturday.

A Whole Lotta Fuss For Nothin'

so the NCAA handed down it's penalties to BAMA today and pretty much nothing happened...just like i predicted. for all the Auburn, LSU, and Tennessee fans out there who were hoping for the NCAA to pull a 3 guys 1 Hammer on the Tide (WARNING: NEVER WATCH THAT VIDEO!!! EVER!!!! NEVER!!! there are some things you can never un-see.) then you were probably disappointed. they have to vacate some wins and pay a fine and they're on probation for 3 years...but yeah no big deal. being that i'm not one of those psychotic SEC fans who wishes sanctions upon all my rivals i can only say i'm happy for Alabama. the last thing i want as an SEC fan is for another damn school in our conference to be on probation...unless it's Florida (fuck those guys! they need to be humbled.) so if Auburn wants to stop the Bama onslaught then they are gonna have to do it the oldfashioned way, on the field...which is the only place that matters.

i'm sure the average Auburn fan assumed this is what was going to happen and then there are those bunker dwellers who were praying for a death penalty that was never gonna happen...regardless of any of that i will be avoiding all Auburn/Bama related message boards to protect my own sanity and to avoid the jackassery that comes with it.

for something more pleasant...Ted Leo is playing at the 40 Watt tonight in Athens. count me as stoked.

Nick Saban, coming to a theater near you.

Nick Saban is apparently gonna play himself in the movie adaptation of Blindside, as well as Ed Orgeron & Phil Fulmer. my question is who the fuck are they gonna get to play Michael Oher? i'm sure this in no way is about recruiting. whatever, i'm not gonna be a hater, it's a smart move if it's just a bit part.

they've all got a long way to go before they can match the acting chops of Mark Richt.

Bama Bangs To Invade Hotlanta

watch out ladies...this haircut is hitting the big city.

John Parker Wilson is now an Atlanta Falcon.

let's go with one of JP's greatest hits to celebrate this signing by the Dirty Birds.


To quote Steven Colbert, "NOOOOOOOOOO!"

Pray to whatever god you worship that he protects Matt Ryan.

look on the bright side

hey Auburn is probably going to the NIT...but at least we have those pictures of Katy Perry in Esquire magazine to keep us happy.

my love of this talentless hack is totally shameless.

of course if you really want sexy...then Andre Smith has you covered.

BAMA Textbook Drama

this is a great Halloween costume.

hey remember that thing with the Alabama players selling textbooks back that they bought with scholarsip money or some shit like that? yeah well looks like the NCAA is maybe, could be, probably gonna seriously drop some NCAA style justice on their ass. or that's what a lot of the SEC (read LSU & Auburn) fans will be hoping for anyways. i for one am not a fan of anyone getting put on probation for something that doesn't involve paying players or fixing grades, but it's Alabama and we all know that the NCAA has a hard-on for giving probation to SEC schools. so yeah, i never thought this was gonna be an issue...but looks like it might very well be a big way. my guess is that they might lose a few scholarships at most, i highly doubt they'll get any of that NO-TV and NO-BOWL GAME type ass whiping and the Death Penalty is never gonna happen to anyone every again.

so yeah, why exactly is USC still off the hook for the Reggie Bush shit?

Andre Smith=Dumb, Knowshon=Slow

apparently Andre Smith is fat, lazy, and possibly dumb and for that his draft stock is falling like a stone. he's likely dropped out of the top 10 and might be the 4th tackle taken in the draft. as far as i'm concerned he's the best prospect available and if he somehow falls to where the Falcons are drafting they'd be crazy not to take him. sucks for his bank account though. Big Boy, you can't just LEAVE the NFL combine!!! what the fuck is the matter with you kid?

but hey it could be worse for Andre Smith. he could be one of the slowest running backs in the entire draft like some guy named Knowshon something or other who used to play for some team. apparently he ran a 4.62!!! at the combine. for a runningback that's like "old people fucking" slow. i mean Chris Ogbonnaya who was a fullback at Texas ran faster than Moreno. it's kind of hard to believe as Knowshon never seemed to have any trouble running away from Auburn players while scoring touchdowns. luckily for Knowshon this is the weakest runningback class in years and it's doubtful he'll fall out of the 1st round...but ya never know.

fuck you James Willis

Auburn has it's own Benedict Arnold now. James Willis is jumping ship to join Saban's Alabama staff. Sure I know, it's just business blah blah blah...and i'd agree with you if Willis was going to Florida, or Ole Miss, or even Georgia...but The Tide?!! Nah, that gets you a FUCK YOU 4 LIFE! And being an ex-player gets you the biggest go fuck yourself of all.

The Hate is back.

Some final LOL-ish thoughts about the Sugar Bowl

little did Coach Vader know the game was being played on Endor...

later that night John Parker Wilson's helmet was used for a drum after the Utes feasted upon his entrails.


yeah i know...36-0. but you gotta take some enjoyment somewhere.

In AUBURN NEWS

i may have been insanely pissed about Auburn hiring Gene Chizik but so far he's put together a pretty fucking awesome offensive staff. first with the Malzahn hire and then landing a great running back coach in Curtis Luper from Oklahoma State (who was lead the Big 12 in rushing the past 3 years), and now Trooper Taylor joins the team. he's a hell of a recruiter and a great receivers coach which is something we've needed these past few seasons more than anything. hopefully he can school Billings, Hawthorne, and Slaughter on the fine art of catching the football and make those 4 stars that came attached to all their names worth it. War Eagle indeed.

ALABAMA DONE PULLED AN OKLAHOMA

What in tarnation done happened?

UTAH SPEED!!!!! It kills, apparently.

After the shitty season I just endured I should probably soak up some of this Bama misery for myself and enjoy it, but taking pleasure in other peoples pain is so 2008. Besides Utah probably would have beaten Auburn by 60. That being said this was just Bama pulling one of their classic moves of getting beaten by some random ass team that half their fanbase hath never heard of before anyways. It comes along with those 37 national titles and shrines to the Bear.

But yeah I was shocked. I thought Alabama losing Andre Smith might have a slight effect on the Tide's ability to run the football and protect John Parker Wilson, but I had no idea it was gonna turn Utah's front 7 into the 2005 Auburn Tiger Iron Bowl Sack Machine. I kept wondering if Stanley McClover was secretly on the Utes d-line doing his best to turn JPW in Brodie 2. Damn! And for the non-BCS conference haters I will say to you, eat a bag of dicks. Utah is fucking good and outside of Florida, Texas, Oklahoma, & USC I think they'd take out any team in the country. But no, they didn't even get to sniff that BCS trophy...which is all the more reason we should all be screaming PLAYOFF!!! Also its time to give the Mountain West an automatics bid. They have 2 top 10 teams this year and are undefeated in their BCS bowl matchups. Just sayin'.

On another Auburn related note, how much you want to bet that if Auburn hadn't already hired Gene Chzik that Kyle Whittingham would be getting that coaching job today? Hell there probably were a lot of people saying let's go ahead anf fire Chizik now and hire this guy to come in...he can beat Saban. Regardless the good jobs are all gone but that dude is about to be rich as shit next year. Also I was a little inspired to hope that if Auburn can actuallly grasp the concept of Spread Eagle 2 then success againt the Tide may come very quickly, it sure as shit eliminated Alabama's size advantage for Utah...but then again having receiver's who can catch the ball and break tackles probably doesn't hurt either.

In summation I give major props to my Bama loving friend Mr. Bloggins who took the loss about as well as any member of the Tide nation could and it wasn't until the final John Parker sack that he shot his TV with a rifle and ran out into the night looking for a Mormon to pick a fight with. Good times.

BBC in Auburn?!?

via the Auburner

apparently the BBC did a piece on the 2007 Iron Bowl. huh?


not as funny as the episode of Ali G where he pretends to be a gay reporter covering an Alabama football game...but equally as strange.

Still The Best Damn Rivalry In All Of Sports

via the sporting blog by way of everyday should be saturday. Only In Alabama.

Know Your Enemy: Alabama Crimson Tide

Auburn rolls into the season riding a six game winning streak in one of (if not the most) heated rivalries in college football. but this is YEAR TWO in the Nick Saban Rebuilding Project. which means there's no way that Bama is having as lousy a year as they did last season...not for 4 million dollars a year they aren't. Auburn still owns a slight edge over Alabama in terms of on the field talent, especially in Auburn's defense vs. Bama's offense. but help is on the way for the Tide in the form of the greatest recruiting class in school history. Saban might not know how to beat UL Monroe, but he sure as shit can recruit 4 and 5 star man beasts. and so a sense of dread has taken over the happy minds of Auburn fans, who fear their dominance over this most hated rival may be coming to an end. winning 6 times in a row might be the sort of thing you'd think would give a fan base confidence, but this is fucking Alabama and for most of us it's just an act of survival to keep The Tide from reclaiming their foothold on a state rivalry that they dominated for decades.

Alabama's strengths come in the form of one of the best offensive lines in the entire country, headlined of course by Andre Smith, a likely top 5 pick in next year's draft. you might remember him from such moments as this.

i love it when fat guys score. anyways the rest of the line is pretty solid as well, especially senior center Antoine Caldwell (3rd team All SEC). the line is blocking for a talented young running back in Terry Grant (3rd team All SEC) who looks like the first truly NFL caliber runner the Tide has had in years. Grant started the season hot and looked like a possible freshman of the year candidate until injuries and a rotating cast of 8 million runningbacks slowed his season...oh yeah and some guy named Knowshon showed up and took that freshman of the year honor by the horns.

the real weakness of the Tide offense comes in the form of senior QB and perpetual turnover machine, John Parker Wilson. no player cost he's team more games than Wilson. whether it was his poor play against FSU, his interception against Mississippi State, and his costly fumble against LSU; Parker found more ways to lose than he ever did to win. with JP running the show the Tide has turned out 2 straight 6-6 regular seasons and that's something that Bama fans can't stomach anymore. don't be surprised if John Parker finds himself getting pushed for playing time from back up Greg McElroy or true freshman Star Jackson....especially if things start off bad for the Tide. the receiving corp is another weakness for Alabama, but only for lack of experience. Bama landed the number 1 recruit in the nation in five star wide receiver Julio Jones. Jones has been compared to Calvin Johnson in terms of speed and talent, if he's even half as good as Johnson was then Bama could have a lethal redzone threat and a guy who can stretch the field, thereby helping the power running game.

the defense has some real potential lead by senior safety Rashad Johnson and sophomore linebacker Rolando McClain. unfortunately the defense lacks depth thanks to poor recruiting from the Shula era. expect to see lots of freshman getting to play on that side of the ball. and a young defense is often a mistake prone defense. if Alabama wants to climb back on top of the SEC West their D is gonna have to step up sooner than later.

most people wouldn't consider Alabama a real threat to win the SEC West this season. it's basically a two horse race between Auburn and LSU like it has been for the last 8 years or so, but the Tide could greatly impact the West by upsetting one of the top two teams.

i predict Alabama to have a better season than 2007. they start the season off with Clemson at the Georgia Dome. that could set the tone for the entire year if they were able to pull off an upset. after that they've got tough road games against LSU and Georgia and then there's the annual match up with my Auburn team and no Tide fan wants to see this losing streak they are on reach 7. if i was a betting man i'd say Alabama wins 8 games, finally puts the beat down on Mississippi State that they owe them, upsets at least one top 25 team, and ends up in the Chick-Fil-A bowl setting the team up for a West title run next year.