Get Your Nerd Nostalgia On, Plus Help Some Poor Kids

Starting this week and running through the next 3, the WSLA will be showing the original Star Wars trilogy every Friday (and one Saturday) at Midnight for FREE. they are also gonna be collecting unwrapped toys for needy Athens kids. so come out and watch the greatest trilogy of all time before George Lucas fucked it all up with a bunch of digital garbage in the background.

Lies the NFL told me: your fancy college offense don't work in my NFL

NFL Fact: the spread offense doesn't work in the National Football League.

Oh really? Well I am currently watching an NFL matchup between the Saints and Patriots and BOTH of these teams run a fucking spread offense. These offenses have way more in common with what Auburn does than with some boring old Power I or West Coast philosophy. The idea that any player or offense or style "can't work" is the sort of bullshit uncreative thinking that makes college football fans roll their eyes into the backs of their skulls and go into a coma when they listen to NFL "experts" spout their garbage.

Fuck going to Notre Dame, Urban Meyer should go to the NFL.

FUCK YOU TURF TOE!!!

Turf Toe!!! say it ain't so.

you know what that means:

Matt Ryan is probably done for the rest of the year.

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God, why do you hate my Atlanta Falcons so much? is it all the booty music?

goddamncockfacedmotherfuckingpieceofshit!

a random question for NIKE

yo Nike, how did we got from this level of rad

to this fucking bullshit?

A Final Salute To The One Armed Zombie

CHRIS TODD, MOTHERFUCKER!!!! Auburn's ALL TIME Single Season TD Passing Leader. wrap your brain around that little nugget. and here we all thought that the fucker's arm had fallen off for good last year. good job, Todd, my boy. i enjoyed the shit sandwich you fed me this year.

you were the 3rd rated passer in the SEC this year, 4th in TDs, 6th in yards, completed nearly 60% of your passes for an avg. of 8 per pass (3rd in SEC), you only threw 6 INTS (tied for 3rd among regular starters), and you led the 3rd ranked offense in the league. i know Mallett and Tebow are gonna be the 1st and 2nd team QBs but if Todd isn't 3rd team All-SEC this year then it's some bullshit.

do i think Todd has an NFL Future? eh, probably not. but he was a lot better a college QB than i would have ever imagined. i wish this was the guy he would've been last year. but whatever, everything happens for a reason....or some shit.



One Armed Zombie We Salute You! let's hope you can lead us out with a bowl win and you toss a couple more TDs to Darvin Adams for your swan song.

Josh McDaniels, i feel your pain

found this piece of amazing via KSK. i have uttered this very phrase many, many, many times.

i have watched that at least 12 times.

hey remember when the Broncos were 6-0? me neither.

VINCE FUCKING YOUNG!!!!

(what i imagine is going on inside the mind of one Vince "I Am Still Awesome At Football" Young)

Dear Merle Hodge,

suck my motherfucking dick you braindamged old shitty analysing retard.

love,

VY

p.s.

Trent Dilfer can lick my balls. fuck you, douchebags.

REDMAN!!!!!!

when you aren't making awesome movies with Method Man you are winning football games for my Dirty Birds!

a billion sips of purple drank for you sir.

Your ACC Champions!

Dear, ACC.

your conference is a fucking joke.

love,

a couple of middle of the pack SEC teams.

Polls? Who Gives A Fuck Up Your Stupid Polls?

A LIFETIME OF DEFEATS TOP 25, week 13

1. Florida
2. Alabama
3. Texas
4. Cincinnati
5. TCU
6. Boise State
7. Oregon
8. Ohio State
9. Iowa
10. LSU
11. Penn State
12. Oregon State
13. Georgia Tech
14. BYU
15. Virginia Tech
16. Miami
17. Houston
18. Nebraska
19. Pittsburg
20. Oklahoma State
21. West Fucking Virginia
22. California
23. Central Michigan
24. Clemson
25. Georgia, Auburn, Kentucky, South Carolina, Tennessee, Ole Miss, Arkansas (seriously after watching Georgia and South Carolina knock off both ACC division champs don't you think every team in the SEC could win the ACC?)

Good Riddance

college football is about to be down one less douchebag after the Irish wrapped up another disappointing season under Charlie Weis. Notre Dame finishes up the season 6-6 after Stanford gave em a nice little "fuck you" send off. for a team that basically gift wrapped it's own season with as many home games as possible and was in their 5th year under Charlie's "superior NFL system" with countless numbers of 4 and 5 star "talent" a .500 record just ain't gonna cut it.

there have been few college coaches that i've ever hated as much as Weis and that isn't even because he coaches at Notre Dame. the guy has been one giant fucking pile of douche from the moment he stepped on to the scene. that Notre Dame even gave him that giant ass extension because he ALMOST beat USC is one of the dumbest things ever. the dude NEVER WON ANYTHING!!! they had zero big time wins in his tenure. probably the best team they ever beat was Michigan State. it's a miracle they were able to beat Boston College this season. he fucking sucks, he can't coach, his teams can't beat anyone worth a shit, and his recruits are all highly overrated just because they are going to Notre Dame.

a list of suggestions i have for the Irish for their next head coach.

1. Nick Saban
2. Nick Saban
3. Nick Saban
4. Nick Saban
5. Urban Meyer
6. Bobby Petrino
7. Les Miles
8. Nick Saban
9. Lane Kiffin (just to have a possibly bigger douchebag in South Bend)
10. Lou Holtz

BCS BOWL matchups, best guesses.

BCS Title

Florida vs. Texas

Sugar Bowl

Alabama vs. TCU

Fiesta Bowl

Penn State vs. Boise State

Orange Bowl

Cincinnati vs. Georgia Tech

Rose Bowl

Oregon vs. Ohio State

that's a lot of matchups i could care less about other than Texas and Florida.

matchups i'd rather see with the exact same teams.

Alabama vs. Penn State for obvious reasons.

Oregon vs. Georgia Tech for the scoring orgy.

Cincinnati vs. Ohio State for the chance to see Cinci destroy the Buckeyes and claim the title as best team in Ohio.

TCU vs. Boise State in the rematch of last year's bowl game and for the pride of the Little Conference teams. also the winning team's conference gets an automatic BCS bowl bid. that would be fun.

I Think After Yesterday This Still Holds Up

never ever be on the cover of SI. ever.

My Achy Breaky Heart has been broken.

i blame you Billy Ray, for reasons that only the two of us know about.

well that sucked. not in a 36-0 asskicking kinda way, but in a "hey we might really win this shit....oh wait nevermind, you suck!" kinda way, and honestly those are worse sometimes.

The One Armed Zombie did what he could to lead our Tigers to the promised land (not to mention doing a few things to make sure we didn't). and even on the final drive i still believed. but then of course hella shitty clock management pretty much killed that snowball's chance and we are left with a pit of despair at losing to our 3 biggest rivals for a second year in a row.

but i am happy that this Auburn team showed some pride. they refused to let Mark Ingram have his Heisman moment. they refused to be pushed around and dominated like last year. they held Bama outta the endzone on two short fields. they got after the QB. and if they just coulda kept Julio Jones in check a little more they might have just won the game. and so it goes.

going forward i see good things for Auburn. i believe in Gene Chizik. i believe his players want to win for him. i believe in the new staff and their ability to coach up an under talented team. if Auburn can hold on to their offensive guru for a few more seasons then we might actually see another Heisman winner on the Plains. next year we lose Todd, Tate, Trott, Coleman, and McFadden. hopefully Burns, Fannin, Thorpe, and Bynes can all step up and be the leaders they all were this year. hopefully next year Auburn can win a couple of these big rivalry games and start getting some payback in the SEC. i don't think it can happen...i believe it WILL happen.

also a random congrats to the One Armed Zombie for becoming Auburn's all time single season TD leader.

2009 isn't officially over. we've still got our bowl, but honestly nothing matters going forward. 8 wins and a bowl victory would be nice...especially for these seniors who've gone through so much the last 2 years. but right now all that matters is the future. a future that doesn't seem nearly as bleak as it did in 2008.

so War Damn Eagle everyone. and thank you Auburn 2009 for restoring some faith for this lifelong Auburn fan. you might have not been the best team of this decade, but you are easily one of my favorites.

Like A Motherfuckin' Gunslinger

i think those Auburn fans who fear Alabama getting the one thing they've never had and the Tebow haters of college football all got their wish last night as Colt McCoy put on the show of the year for Heisman voters. 304 yards in the air and another 175 on the ground and 5 touchdowns pretty much nails down Colt bringing home the worlds most useless paper weight. there is no way a likeable 4 year starter whose been on the Heisman voters minds for 2 years isn't taking it home after a performance like that, last night on his team's final regular season game to keep their national title hopes alive. as long as the Longhorns win that Big 12 title game then you can guarantee that Colt McCoy is your Heisman winner.

Happy Thanksgiving Everybody

Suicide Watch (2010), Iron Bowl

take that national title shot and shove it down their fucking throats!

War Eagle, Motherfucker.

What's an Iron Bowl?

i think the nosedive the Falcons are taking plus Auburn losing to Georgia has made me lose all interest in football.

It's Almost Over Now

A LIFETIME OF DEFEATS TOP 25, Week 12

1. Alabama
1. Florida
3. Texas
4. Cincinnati
5. TCU
6. Georgia Tech
7. Boise State
8. Pitt
9. Oregon
10. Ohio State
11. Oklahoma State
12. Iowa
13. Penn State
14. Clemson
15. Virginia Tech
16. Ole Miss
17. LSU
18. Oregon State
19. Utah
20. BYU
21. North Carolina
22. Miami
23. California
24. Houston
25. Temple!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This Year I Am Thankful For....Kitten Mittons