The Thug Apologists lose their second straight game in a row (putting us at 4-6 on the season and in 7th place out of 10 teams) and the Romo-Effect is in full swing. that pussy needs to hurry up and get his ass off the sidelines next week before i trade him for some shitty receiver or a backup runningback. this is some fantasy bullshit. we got a black man in the White House but we can't crack a 100 points in a fantasy game with 2 QBs going?!?! what the fuck?! it's time for some drastic action. time to trade Favre. it had to happen sooner or later. if anyone is in my fantasy league and wants that country bumpkin interception machine he's yours for cheep. all i'm asking for is a runningback who can get me about 10 points a week. i'll throw in Jamal Lewis and Matt Jones cocaine lovin' ass for good measure if you can give me a good runningback in return. fucking fantasy football and college pick ems!!! i really don't know what the fuck i am doing and these things are proving that this year.
it's been a long time since i could say that. and i witnessed the winning first hand, as i was at the Homecoming game yesterday vs. Tennessee-Martin. to say it was an enjoyable experience would be stretching. Auburn played like shit for most of the first three quarters letting TN-Martin hang around until Kodi Burns suddenly realized he was a lot better at running the ball than he was at throwing it. rushing for 2 touchdowns in the 2nd half and 158 yards total on the ground, leading the Tigers to a 37-20 victory and saving Tuberville's job for at least a few more weeks.
but before the points onslaught at the end of the game, this one felt very much in doubt. Auburn started strong as they have in most of their games this season by scoring a touchdown on the opening kickoff but then Robert Dunn fumbled a punt into the endzone that gave TN-Martin a 7-7 tie. Auburn then kicked a few field goals and got a short touchdown by Brad Lester to take a 20-7 lead. unfortunately TN-Martin was able to score again on a long drive to close out the first half and that's about the time "the fear" started to creep in. i'd seen this game WAY too many times this season and i knew how it usually ended. when the Skyhawks (yes that's really their school's nickname) scored to open the 3rd quarter and tied it up 20-20, i was pretty much assuming Auburn was about to lose for the first time in school history to a DIAA team and that Tommy Tuberville would likely be fired on Monday...but then thankfully Kodi took over on the ground and saved us all the embarrassment and shame of losing to a cupcake school.
there really weren't many positives, if any, to take away from this game. i mean it's good that Auburn FINALLY got a win. they needed it bad. but this really felt like a microcosm of the entire season. the offense looked inept. the kick coverage is awful. the defense was banged up and couldn't get pressure on the QB. the safeties still can't cover anyone. and if you are a QB who is interested in moving the chains, well just look to the middle of the field against the Tigers because it's wide open all fucking day. the only good things that can be said were that WE DID WIN THE GAME...and at this point, even wins over lower division cupcakes should be looked at positively.
some other thoughts about the game.
Tommy Trott has become Kodi Burn's go to receiver. he's got zero ability to make anyone miss, but he's at least able to catch the damn ball and move the chains. if Auburn had a solid QB then i think Trott could be ALL SEC...maybe next season.
Tristan Davis continues to be Auburn's most criminally underused weapon. the guy has the best fucking speed on the team and can take a play for 60 yards anytime he touches the ball. the fact that he hasn't been the starting running back all year is insane. when i look at him taking those kickoffs for touchdowns i see wasted potential. Auburn should have had him the backfield these last four years as a lethal change of pace back for Kenny Irons and as the go to guy this year. i know injuries have slowed him down, but when he has been healthy he's rarely seen any action outside of special teams and as a lead blocker!??!?! are you kidding me. i totally see Davis getting signed to some NFL team as a free agent to return kick offs and then because of injury to a starter will get into an NFL game and have a huge game and people will be asking who the hell he is and where'd he come from and Auburn fans will be kicking chairs and cursing Tuberville's name.
Kodi Burns IS the Future of this Auburn football team. i just don't think that being the QB is the future he should be pursuing. the kid can't throw the football with any accuracy to save his life...but he's got great speed and great moves and is the best damn runner on the team. a simple solution should be made regarding Mr. Burns. turn him into a runningback. he's built like one. he can break tackles and make people miss. he's got a great second gear and he could probably put on a few more pounds of muscle and find himself taking handoffs on Sundays. whoever is coaching this team next year needs to make this happen.
1. Texas Tech 2. Alabama 3. Florida 4. Texas 5. USC 6. Oklahoma 7. Penn State 8. Utah 9. Boise State 10. Ohio State 11. Missouri 12. Georgia 13. Ball State 14. Oklahoma State 15. TCU 16. BYU 17. LSU 18. North Carolina 19. Michigan State 20. Cincinnati 21. Florida State 22. Pittsburgh 23. South Carolina 24. Virginia Tech 25. Air Force
- My New Number 1 is the Red Paiders' Pirate Academy. what can a team do against such reckless savagery? Texas Tech is out for blood. that's how pirates do. i wonder what it would be like to have a team that can score 50 points in their sleep? too bad Captain Leach would never be given the Good Ship Auburn in a million years. it would probably end in flames...but it'd be a hell of a lot more fun than the Tuberville show.
- Florida is the HOTTEST TEAM IN THE COUNTRY...or at least that's what every journalist in the country will be saying for the next few weeks until the SEC championship game. nevermind that their are a bunch of other teams playing just as well as the Gators and some of them didn't even have to lose to Ole' Miss to become so damn hot.
-with Penn State doing to the nice thing and losing and getting out of the way, we are almost guaranteed a BIG 12 vs. SEC national title. and i'm all for it. USC will just have to settle for feasting on Penn State in another Rose Bowl blowout.
-if both Utah and Boise State go undefeated i don't think it's fair to leave either of them out of the BCS. both schools have been BCS busters in the past. both teams have WON BCS bowl games. both teams are among the best Non-BCS schools. they'd probably be the 2nd, 3rd or 4th best teams in the The ACC, Pac 10, or Big 10 this season...and they'd out and out win the Big East...so a solution would be to award both of them a BCS matchup (i'm looking at you Fiesta Bowl) with one another to decide who the best Non-BCS school in the nation is with the winning school's conference taking The Big East's automatic bid. just an idea...noone will listen to it of course.
-speaking of the Big East...does anyone want to have to watch Pitt or Cincinnati play the ACC winner in the Orange Bowl? the Horror.
you probably remember the 2005 college football season as USC's run into the record books as the greatest team of all time. ESPN even had a little segment on sportscenter everyday leading up to the title game with Texas where they pitted the 2005 Trojans vs. a collection of the greatest teams in the history of college football and awarded USC victory in every single contest (me thinks the 2001 Hurricanes would have thugged upon those Trojans most viciously). And so USC was crowned the greatest team of all time. obviously someone forgot to tell this to Vince Young. video evidence please.
during that run and in the NFL drafts that followed it has been said by all the experts the USC has the best collection of NFL ready talent of any team in the country. of the players who were on the 2003 & 2004 national title teams...26 of them were drafted. but how many of these great players were actually NFL ready players? and how many of them are even in the league still?
here's a breakdown of players drafted who were on those national title squads. and what teams they were drafted by and what they are currently doing.
2007 Current Status Dwayne Jarrett Panthers WR sucking Steve Smith Giants WR plays for Giants Ryan Kalil Panthers C backup Dallas Sartz Redskins LB out of the league Oscar Lua Patriots LB out of the league
2006 Reggie Bush Saints RB finally having his breakout year Matt Leinart Cardinals QB holding a clip board Winston Justice Eagles T giving up sacks Deuce Lutui Cardinals G could possibly be a starter LenDale White Titans RB fat. scoring touchdowns. Frostee Rucker Bengals DE sucking Dominique Byrd Rams TE out of the league Darnell Bing Raiders DB out of the league David Kirtman Seahawks RB out of the league LaJuan Ramsey Eagles DT out of the league Fred Matua Lions G out of the league
2005 supplemental draft Manuel Wright Dolphins DT cyring...also out of the league
2005 Mike Williams Lions WR being a big fucking bust. out of the league. Mike Patterson Eagles DT sucking. Shaun Cody Lions DT being a bust. Lofa Tatupu Seahawks LB pro bowler Matt Cassel Patriots QB for some reason a starting QB.
2004 Kenechi Udeze Vikings DE he's okay...i guess. Jacob Rogers Cowboys T out of the league Keary Colbert Panthers WR fine possession receiver. doesn't play much. Will Poole Dolphins DB out of the league
of this group of players the most successful have been Reggie Bush (who has yet to live up to the hype), Lendale White (a good enough goalline back but not a star by any means), Steve Smith (a nice possession receiver), Matt Cassell (who never started a game in college and looks like a better pro QB than Leinart at this point), and Lofa Tatupu (legit pro bowl player). the rest of these guys have either been dissappointments (Leinart, Winston Justice...just ask any Eagles fan, Shaun Cody, Mike Patterson, etc...) or just complete busts (Mike Williams, Dwayne Jarrett, Frostee Rucker). hell a lot of them aren't even in the league anymore or didn't even make the team they were drafted by.
on the flipside the 2001 Miami Hurricanes had a roster full of NFL players who have been either stars or at least valuable members of the league. i mean just look at their fucking backfield. that would be an awesome fantasy team.
Willis McGahee RB Clinton Portis RB Najeh Davenport RB Frank Gore RB Andre Johnson WR Roscoe Parrish WR Kellen Winslow TE Jermey Shockey TE Bryant McKinnie OL Antrel Rolle CB Phillip Buchanon CB Mike Rumph CB DJ Williams LB Jonathan Vilma LB Vince Wilfork DT Sean Taylor (RIP) S
hell the 2004 Auburn Tigers have more quality players currently starting than the 2004 Trojans do.
as much respect as i have for USC and their ability to kick the asses of most teams they play, i think it's time to get off of the bandwagon when it comes to saying that they have "by far the best talent in the country". they have the deepest talent of recruits for sure...but do they really have the best? i don't really think so.
ENOUGH!!!! with the fucking blackouts already. other than UGA's destruction by the Tide, Middle Tennessee State and Utah have both had one this year and neither team has any fucking black in their school colors. whatever, it worked for both of them so i guess i should keep my mouth shut. Utah plays like shit all night and still manages to pull out a win vs. TCU to keep their BCS hopes alive. it'll be a clash of the Mormons at the end of the year vs. BYU to see if they nab one of those at-large bids. honestly i think Boise State and Utah should both get BCS spots if they go undefeated and should play one another in the Orange Bowl...it'd be a lot better than having to watch the ACC champs vs. the Big East Champ.
speaking of the ACC, Va Tech (in the worlds 2nd ugliest jersey of all time) beat the most schizophrenic team in the country aka Maryland to keep that tire fire of a fucktard conference burning. if you told me that Clemson still had a chance of winning the ACC i'd probably believe you. college football on Thursday night is where reality goes to die.
but seriously, someone has to put a stop to Nike and their re-imagining of school uniforms. every Thursday night on ESPN you see some kind of eye rape being rolled out onto the field. me and Kenniebloggins are working on a list of the top 25 ugliest uniforms in college football. it's coming soon. it should also be noted HOW MUCH I FUCKING SUCK AT COLLEGE FOOTBALL PICK EMS!!! i got both games wrong and for the season Thursday nights are totally kicking my ass. it's a damn good thing i don't gamble.
so it's homecoming this weekend for the Tigers. not that they'll probably be feeling very welcome in Auburn this weekend. The Tigers are riding a 4 game losing streak (and 5 losses outta the past 6) and this is possibly their last chance for a win this season with the rivalry games against Georgia and Bama likely to be crushing defeats. never under the Tuberville run has the team's future seemed so completely up in the air.
there's not really a whole lot i can say about Auburn's opponent Tennessee-Martin. they are a Division IAA school with a 7-2 record. they got crushed 56-7 against South Florida in their only matchup vs. a DI school this year. they've scored 56, 63, and 87 points in games this year...so i assume that means they've got a pretty good offense for a DIAA school. wait....87 points!!! are you fucking serious?!! were they playing a highschool team?! and they've got uniforms that look exactly like Auburn's. a loss to a team called the Skyhawks would be even more embarrassing than Bama's loss to the Warhawks of UL-Monroe last season.
Auburn has injuries all over the place. they've got no kind of offense to speak of. they morale is as low as it could possibly be and the coach is possibly going to be fired at the end of the season...if there was a more perfect way to put the final nail in this season's coffin than to lose a homecoming game to a lower division school then i can't think of one. a loss here would also guarantee that Coach Tuberville would be fired at the end of the year...hell maybe at the end of the game. i have zero faith left with this team...and sadly i'll be in the stands watching this game live. i could be witnessing something historic. it could either be the last win of the Tuberville era or it could be the last loss. regardless you can't call anything a gimme for this team anymore. the only gimmes are that CHANGE is coming to the Plains for 09.
potential for tragedy: 10, yeah i know that this is the biggest mismatch that the Tigers have had all season...but have you actually watched this team play football? until they win a fucking game i don't believe they can beat anyone.
method of suicide: the entire Auburn fanbase shall throw themselves in front of a train.
So Tuberville claims he's got a stack of resumes on his desk from offensive coordinators looking to be the next guy running Auburn's O next season. i'd like to believe that this is in fact the truth, but something tells me this is just a smokescreen to keep the recruiting class intact and to avoid the constant question of what kind of offense the Tigers plan on running next season.
Tuberville said. "We're not going to change much of what we're doing. We're still going to be multiple." Multiple? what does this team do in multiples other than turnover the ball, not gain many yards, and fail to score points? sorry Coach but statements like that don't exactly inspire much faith from the fanbase.
maybe i'm caught up in my current Obama-love but change isn't sounding like such a bad thing to me when i read shit like "we're not going to change much of what we're doing." so you're planning on continuing to suck next season and cause me to jump off a bridge or drive my car in front of a train?! thanks a lot.
sometimes i get the feeling Tommy wants to get fired at the end of this season so that he can take a year off and then go land a less stressful job opening in either the Big 12 or ACC the following year. like maybe go back to Miami...i have a feeling Randy Shannon's ass will probably be getting fired next year if he doesn't turn the 'Canes around. but honestly i have no idea what i'm talking about...i'm just frustrated beyond belief and i've lost all faith in Auburn football.
Another game in my Dynasty Mode, another blowout. Auburn destroys Ole Miss 55 to 0. it's all about the rushing attack.
Brad Lester 161 yards 2 tds Ben Tate 100 yards 1 td Tristan Davis 100 yards 1 td
Kodi Burns has a productive game with 163 yards passing and 3 tds but also threw 2 picks and fumbled the ball away once. he rushed for another 43 yards and scored a rushing touchdown. he's currently 5th in Heisman voting.
The Defense was it's typical aggressive self racking up 9 sacks and 2 ints. Antonio Coleman leading the way with 2 sacks (18 for the season).
So that pillar of NFL stability out in Oakland is releasing DeAngelo Hall from his contract this week. so they traded a 2nd round pick to Atlanta and gave Hall a huge contract and are getting rid of him after 8 games?!? HAHAHAHAHA!!!! i mean i loved me some Raiders as a kid, but that ship isn't sinking anymore...it already fucking sunk. I hope McFadden can escape from that blackhole and end up on a good football team sooner than later. i hate to think of his talent being wasted. as for Hall, he'll more than likely get picked up by a contender for the stretch run and get another big contract. he's easily my least favorite Falcon of all time and i'll agree with my good friend Kenniebloggins who said that getting rid of DeAngelo was the best move that Atlanta made this entire offseason.
i mean i was already voting for the guy anyways, but he put that final little touch on it for me last night for his support of a College Football Playoff.
when you get in the White House you need to use your power to first and foremost fix College Football...then you can worry about all that other crap.
i wonder how many 1 issue voters there are out there who this would sway? my hope is zero.....but America is full of idiots, so you never know.
seriously though, i don't care who you are voting for. just make sure you vote today. it took me a little less than an hour to vote this morning and there were even a couple of Georgia football players in line with me. who knew they let those kids leave the practice field long enough to do things like vote?
TONIGHT! Monday Night Football! the battle royale! vs. and this fucking guy thrown in for good measure.
seriously who thought it was a good idea to let Chris Berman interview McCain and Obama? i wonder if he'll have annoying knicknames for them both? dear god, help us all.
with Auburn's season in the toilet and my fantasy team totally proving itself to be sucktastic, it gives me a great since of relief to know that the Atlanta Falcons can go out on a Sunday and just kick someone's fucking ass like they did against that alleged NFL franchise out in Oakland. also watching De'Angelo Hall get burned multiple times in the game just added to the pleasure of the Falcons' blowout victory over the Raiders. i can't believe it, but this team rules. a win next week over the Saints and the Playoffs look like a very real possibility. at this point i gotta believe this team is gonna at least go 9-7. the Falcons are entering the toughest part of their schedule with 2 games against the Saints, the Broncos and Panthers coming to ATL, and a trip out to San Diego over the next 5 weeks. if the Falcons can go 3-2 in that stretch then you have to think they are a legitimate playoff contender.
it's 100% official, following the most painful season in Falcons history, Atlanta made possibly the 3 best moves in franchise history by hiring Mike Smith, signing Michael Turner, and drafting Matt Fucking Ryan (aka Fucknuts McWhitey aka the MOST AWESOME QB IN FALCONS HISTORY BESIDES MIKE VICK ON MADDEN). i have never been so happy to be so wrong about this team.
Fulmer fired...or forced out...or what-the-fuck-evered, he's gone at the end of the season is all it really matters. dude was a lifer and now he's gonna be sitting at home and not dealing with his ungrateful fanbase next season. guy won a national title 10 years ago and now he's done. the SEC is fucking crazy...let this be a message to any young coach out there who wants to come join this shitstorm. this is also all the more reason for Auburn to NOT FIRE Tommy Tuberville. Tennessee has got more money and more prestige and they are THE state school. The Vols will attract far better candidates than the Tigers can. Tommy gets one more year if the board of trustees know what's best for the University's football team. if Tommy can't get this thing turned around next season, well then maybe we bring in some new blood. but right now we're just asking for the leftovers.
1. Alabama 2. Penn State 3. Texas Tech 4. Florida 5. USC 6. Texas 7. Oklahoma 8. Oklahoma State 9. Boise State 10. Utah 11. TCU 12. Georgia 13. Missouri 14. Ohio State 15. LSU 16. Ball State 17. BYU 18. West Fucking Virginia 19. California 20. Michigan State 21. Cincinatti 22. North Carolina 23. Maryland 24. Georgia Tech 25. FSU
- it's one thing to lose a game on the final play, that's a heartbreaker. but when you lose a game on the final play after just dropping the game winning interception a play before is just like getting your heartbroken and getting kicked in the balls for good measure...but when you factor in that you were down the entire game, fought back, took the lead, and then gave up a game winning touchdown with 1 second left that not only lost you the game but also the number 1 ranking in the country and a shot at the national title all in that same momement...well that's like having your heart explode inside you just as your balls are being ripped off and your head is set on fire. Texas Tech will ruin your life. oh yes they will.
- and so now the Target gets worn by Bama. good luck with that.
- hey i think Florida just scored another touchdown. Tebow better get ready to crank dat Heisman again.
- USC's final score against Washington and Washington State this year: 125-0. ouch.
- when i see Nebraska getting destroyed 62-28 it gives me horrible visions of Auburn turning into the SEC's version of the Huskers.
- West Fucking Virginia is back. better recognize.
- the ACC shitstorm continues. probable championship game matchup: Georgia Tech vs. Maryland. the Orange Bowl has a boner, i'm sure.
- after Texas lost it seems almost inevitable that we are gonna get a Penn State vs. whoever wins the SEC or Big 12 national title. but honestly after this weekend the game i wanna see is USC vs. Florida.
i have dubbed this season the QUEST FOR NEVER ENDING SUCK. and after getting Nutted upon by an Ole Miss team that really was trying to give Auburn every chance they could all game long to win....and still managing to lose i think the title has become well earned.
i look back now on the puntastic victories over Mississippi State and Tennessee with some longing for the good ole days. at this point Auburn is almost assuredly going 5-7 barring some kind of miracle. but i also realized during the ass whipping last week to West Virginia that i don't even care anymore so as i watched Kodi Burns toss drive killing pick after pick i never got angry. i never screamed or yelled. i never even got that annoyed. mostly i just laughed or shook my head and smiled because this Auburn team is NOT gonna be the death of me. i can accept a losing season and not dip into the darkest regions of depression. it's okay. i can just watch the Falcons and play my Dynasty Mode on NCAA 2009 and pretend Auburn's Spread Eagle offense was a smashing success. it's all good. nothings wrong.
but seriously, this fucking sucks. i'm tired of this bullshit and it saddens me to think that i'll be at the homecoming game next weekend watching what might very well be Tommy Tuberville's final win as the headcoach of the Auburn Tigers. and so it goes.
woooo!!!!!! Ric Flair approves. i have not come to rub Georgia's face in the shit that they took on the field yesterday...no, instead i have come to praise the mighty Gators for they are one first down away from being the best team in the country. the Dawgs never stood a chance. not with depleted offensive and defensive lines and a QB who likes to toss picks when he's behind. much like the Georgia/Bama game, there was really no doubt from the word Go what was gonna happen. Georgia just doesn't have the defense to hang with a team like Florida. an entire off season of shit talking and national title dreams was officially laid to waste in the 2nd half down in Jacksonville. all that's really left is to play out the season and beat Auburn (should be no real problem) and hope that those Yellow Jackets don't end your streak over them. there will be no rematch with the Tide, no Sugar Bowl, no BCS title....nah baby. Let's Go Outback Tonight.
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