Positive Vibes Friday: Being Rich Is Awesome

Matt Stafford on his summer vacation. probably more fun than yours.

more Lulz

ROID SOX (that's just too easy)

sometimes a story just brightens your day.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

whatever, i know everyone was cheating in the last 15 years or whatever...probably some of the Braves too (i'm looking at your David Justice and Gary Sheffield), but having the 2 players most responsible for the Red Sox rise to power linked to positive tests all the way back in 03 BEFORE they ever won a title....well when you are as obnoxious as the Red Sox fans are you kind of deserve this news. also don't forget Johnny Damon has seen his name whispered as being an x-roider too. the only thing that could make this any sweeter is if they found out that douchebag Curt Schilling was on the juice.

is it just me...

....or does blogspot just feel like its dead (ya know, like myspace dead...not Kurt Cobain dead)? Maybe its time to move this whole venture to tumblr. Are there any tumblr sites out there not dedicated to nude pics of hot chicks or Harry Potter vs. Twilight nerdoffs? Can a college football tumblr exist? Does anyone even care anymore?

Hey, LOST fans or people who like campy 60s TV shows

My friends Grape Soda wrote a theme song and made opening credits for LOST reimagined as a campy 60s action show

The CHIZ gettin' his Speak On

SEC MEDIA DAYS BLAH BLAH BLAH

Gene Chizik, Auburn Tigers Head Coach, at 2009 SEC Media Days

Positive Vibes Friday: Kick This Weekend's Ass and Party To Save The World

Andrew WK is a source of much inspiration for me via his overthetop positive Twitter updates. if you're on twitter and aren't following AWK then you should fix that, now.

If we put out good vibes, we get 3 x the goodness in return. If we put out bad vibes, we get 3 x the harshness. PARTYING = GOOD VIBES

If we party, we'll be in a good mood. If we're in a good mood, we can approach situations in a loving way = PARTY 2 SAVE THE WORLD!

The Least Interesting Super Secret Dunk Of All Time

the way King James and Nike tried to bury this shit you'd have thought the kid ran up his back, dunked it, and then smacked Lebron in the face with his crotch.


honestly if this bullshit had just gone up on the internet in the first place without Lebron gettin' all pissy about it then noone would have even cared. it's not like the video looks like this...

THE WISDOM OF KENNY POWERS

i watched Season 1 of EAST BOUND & DOWN. the tragic story of former Atlanta pitcher Kenny Powers. best fucking show ever.

it's got everything.

comedy


drama


and wisdom.....so much fucking wisdom


"Undaunted, I knew the game was mine to win. Just like in life, all of my successes depend on me. I'm the man who has the ball, I'm the man who can throw it faster than fuck. So that is why I am better than everyone in the world. Kiss my ass and suck my dick. Everyone."

Fucking Phillies Need to Quit All This Winning Bullshit

So the Braves picked a really crappy time to get hot as the Phillies refuse to lose any games whatsoever. Atlanta has climbed into 2nd place in the NL East but that's pretty much like being the tallest midget.

Atlanta needs to resign Kenny Fucking Powers and they need to do it quick.

Space + Pop = Spacepop?

this is the video for Mark Mallman's new jam "Invincible Criminal"...currently it is my job to pimp said video out to the internets...also i happen to think it's a pretty awesome pop song that sounds like what it would be like if Elton John and that band The Darkness had a baby together...or something. so yeah, watch it...love it...repost it elsewhere. thanks.

Auburn gets a BIG commit today. Puns are for idiots.

Four Star offensive tackle and former FSU commit, Aubrey Phillips, just became a Tiger today. apparently he showed up at FSU a little bit on the FAT MOTHERFUCKER side and got picked on by his coach about the extra weight until he said, "Fuck You Man, I'm Outta Here." and now he's at Auburn. so yeah it's a bit worrisome the way he ends up at Auburn, but still he was a 4 star offensive line recruit at a position of need for the Tigers. even if he has to sit out the year to get in shape, it's still a smart move to add a big body like his.

so yeah, some awesome news. now back to trying to find that video of Erin Andrews undressing in her hotel room.

Tiger missed the Cut?

HAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHaHAhAHaHaHaHAHahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I don't even like golf.

Hey Athens, If You Ain't Doin' Nothing Saturday Night Come Down to Go Bar.

i'm DJing Saturday night after the band Music Hates You plays. i'll be playing nothing by 70s & early 80s hardrock (Bon Scott era AC/DC, Cheap Trick, Rainbow, Hawkwind, lots and lots of Thin Lizzy, and probably some Sabbath). come out, get drunk, and pump your fists to the best riffage of all time. should be fun.

Positive Vibes Friday: Headin' For A Showdown

ELO's "Showdown" aka the song i'd have play whereever i went if i could have my own theme song.

COACHES ALL SEC PRE-SEASON TEAM

surprise surprise. not a lot of Auburn love from the coaches. still i think Clinton Durst and Ryan Pugh both got robbed. and i know the SEC is a QB wasteland right now...but MIKE FUCKING HARTLINE is on the 3rd team?!

2009 SEC COACHES PRE-SEASON ALL-SEC FOOTBALL TEAM

Pos. Name, School Ht. Wt. Class Hometown

First-Team Offense

TE Richard Dickson, LSU 6-3 246 Sr. Ocean Springs, Miss.
*OL Ciron Black, LSU 6-5 325 Sr. Tyler, Texas
OL Mike Johnson, Alabama 6-6 305 Sr. Pensacola, Fla.
OL Mike Pouncey, Florida 6-5 312 Jr. Lakeland, Fla.
OL John Jerry, Ole Miss 6-5 350 Sr. Batesville, Miss.
C Maurkice Pouncey, Florida 6-5 312 Jr. Lakeland, Fla.
*WR Julio Jones, Alabama 6-4 210 So. Foley, Ala.
WR A.J. Green, Georgia 6-4 207 So. Summerville, S.C.
QB Tim Tebow, Florida 6-3 240 Sr. Jacksonville, Fla.
RB Michael Smith, Arkansas 5-7 176 Sr. Tallahassee, Fla.
RB Charles Scott, LSU 5-11 233 Sr. Saline, La.

Second-Team Offense

TE D.J. Williams, Arkansas 6-2 251 Jr. Little Rock, Ark.
OL Lee Ziemba, Auburn 6-8 285 Jr. Rogers, Ark.
OL Clint Boling, Georgia 6-5 297 Jr. Alpharetta, Ga.
#OL Chris Scott, Tennessee 6-5 346 Sr. Riverdale, Ga.
#OL Carl Johnson, Florida 6-6 330 Jr. Durham, N.C.
#OL Cordy Glenn, Georgia 6-5 331 So. Riverdale, Ga.
C Josh McNeil, Tennessee 6-4 280 Sr. Collins, Miss.
WR Brandon LaFell, LSU 6-3 209 Sr. Houston, Texas
WR Dexter McCluster, Ole Miss 5-8 165 Sr. Largo, Fla.
QB Jevan Snead, Ole Miss 6-3 215 Jr. Stephenville, Texas
RB Anthony Dixon, Mississippi State 6-1 235 Sr. Jackson, Miss.
RB Jeff Demps, Florida 5-8 176 So. Winter Garden, Fla.

Third-Team Offense

TE Aaron Hernandez, Florida 6-3 255 Jr. Bristol, Conn.
OL Jacques McClendon, Tennessee 6-3 324 Sr. Cleveland, Tenn.
OL Zipp Duncan, Kentucky 6-5 291 Sr. Magnolia, Ky.
OL Mitch Petrus, Arkansas 6-4 315 Sr. Carlisle, Ark.
OL Trinton Sturdivant, Georgia 6-5 306 So. Wadesboro, N.C.
C Jorge Gonzalez, Kentucky 6-3 300 Sr. Tampa, Fla.
WR Shay Hodge, Ole Miss 6-1 207 Sr. Morton, Miss.
#WR Terrance Tolliver, LSU 6-5 194 Jr. Hempstead, Texas
#WR Gerald Jones, Tennessee 6-0 199 Jr. Oklahoma City, Okla.
#QB Stephen Garcia, South Carolina 6-2 219 So. Lutz, Fla.
#QB Mike Hartline, Kentucky 6-6 206 Jr. Canton, Ohio
RB Mark Ingram, Alabama 5-10 215 So. Flint, Mich.
RB Ben Tate, Auburn 5-11 216 Sr. Newark, Md.


First-Team Defense

DL Terrence Cody, Alabama 6-5 365 Sr. Fort Myers, Fla.
DL Greg Hardy, Ole Miss 6-4 265 Sr. Millington, Tenn.
DL Carlos Dunlap, Florida 6-6 290 Jr. North Charleston, S.C.
LB Rolando McClain, Alabama 6-4 249 Jr. Decatur, Ala.
LB Brandon Spikes, Florida 6-3 245 Sr. Shelby, N.C.
LB Rennie Curran, Georgia 5-11 222 Jr. Snellville, Ga.
LB Eric Norwood, South Carolina 6-1 252 Sr. Acworth, Ga.
*DB Eric Berry, Tennessee 5-11 203 Jr. Fairburn, Ga.
DB Javier Arenas, Alabama 5-9 198 Sr. Tampa, Fla.
DB Trevard Lindley, Kentucky 6-0 179 Sr. Hiram, Ga.
DB Joe Haden, Florida 5-11 185 Jr. Ft. Washington, Md.

Second-Team Defense

DL Charles Alexander, LSU 6-3 310 Sr. Breaux Bridge, La.
DL Antonio Coleman, Auburn 6-3 250 Sr. Mobile, Ala.
#DL Geno Atkins, Georgia 6-1 290 Sr. Pembroke Pines, Fla.
#DL Dan Williams, Tennessee 6-3 327 Sr. Memphis, Tenn.
#DL Malcolm Sheppard, Arkansas 6-2 280 Sr. Bainbridge, Ga.
LB Micah Johnson, Kentucky 6-2 258 Sr. Ft. Campbell, Ky.
LB Patrick Benoist, Vanderbilt 6-0 224 Sr. Southlake, Texas
LB Rico McCoy, Tennessee 6-1 220 Sr. Washington, D.C.
LB Dont'a Hightower, Alabama 6-4 250 So. Lewisburg, Tenn.
DB Ahmad Black, Florida 5-9 190 Jr. Lakeland, Fla.
DB Chad Jones, LSU 6-3 214 Jr. New Orleans, La.
DB Prince Miller, Georgia 5-8 198 Sr. Duncan, S.C.
DB Myron Lewis, Vanderbilt 6-2 205 Sr. Pompano Beach, Fla.

Third-Team Defense

DL Jeff Owens, Georgia 6-3 300 Sr. Sunrise, Fla.
DL Marcus Tillman, Ole Miss 6-4 260 Sr. McCall Creek, Miss.
#DL Rahim Alem, LSU 6-3 254 Sr. New Orleans, La.
#DL Corey Peters, Kentucky 6-3 295 Sr. Louisville, Ky.
LB Chris Marve, Vanderbilt 6-0 228 So. Memphis, Tenn.
LB Jamar Chaney, Mississippi State 6-1 245 Sr. Fort Pierce, Fla.
LB Ryan Stamper, Florida 6-2 232 Sr. Jacksonville, Fla.
LB Perry Riley, LSU 6-1 240 Sr. Ellenwood, Ga.
DB Major Wright, Florida 6-0 200 Jr. Miramar, Fla.
DB Janoris Jenkins, Florida 5-10 185 So. Pahokee, Fla.
#DB Ryan Hamilton, Vanderbilt 6-2 210 Sr. Wycombe, Penn.
#DB Chris Culliver, South Carolina 6-0 190 Jr. Garner, N.C.
#DB Reshad Jones, Georgia 6-2 214 Jr. Atlanta, Ga.

First-Team Specialists

PK Leigh Tiffin, Alabama 6-1 199 Sr. Muscle Shoals, Ala.
P Chas Henry, Florida 6-4 215 Jr. Dallas, Ga.
RS Brandon James, Florida 5-7 186 Sr. St. Augustine, Fla.

Second-Team Specialists

PK Jonathan Phillips, Florida 5-10 210 Sr. Wellington, Fla.
P Brett Upson, Vanderbilt 5-11 185 Sr. Griffin, Ga.
RS Javier Arenas, Alabama 5-9 198 Sr. Tampa, Fla.

Third-Team Specialists

PK Joshua Shene, Ole Miss 5-8 170 Sr. Oklahoma City, Okla.
P Spencer Lanning, South Carolina 5-11 188 Jr. Rock Hill, S.C.
RS Trindon Holliday, LSU 5-5 165 Sr. Zachary, La.


* - Unanimous Selections
# - Ties

Amazing

Plainsman Parking Lot writes an open letter to all our girlfriends to apologize for our obsession with NCAA Football 2010.

What I Learned During the 09 All Star Game

While watching the Allstar game on Tuesday I realized something...baseball is dead to me.

I don't know anything about baseball outside of the Atlanta Braves, and even that is spotty at best. I didn't know just as many guys who were playing as did. In the past this would've been a sin for me, now it just tells me 2 things: 1, baseball is having a generational changeover right now and most of the stars from the 90s and early 2000s are retiring/ getting exposed for steroid abuse/ turning into marginal bit players. And 2, I could really give a fuck about baseball anymore because of ESPN's constant northeastern bias to all thing YANKS/SOX and also Mets and Phillies to the point that I never watch even a second of Baseball Tonight (a show I worshipped as a teen) and never watch a televised baseball game that does not involve Atlanta.

And so it has become official: baseball, the sport I played from 6-16 and loved even longer...the thing is obsessed over as a kid even more than Auburn football or comic books has become a sport I know nothing about and care even less. The NFL, College Football, March Madness, the NBA, & Ninja Warrior (the show on Spike TV where lil' Japanese dudes try to make it through an obstacle course) are all sports i'd rather watch than a Major League Baseball game.

And so it goes.

TOAST

Ole Miss 7-5, i'm callin' it.

God, I Can't Wait For Football Season