I also root for the Falcons, so at least i've got that going for me.

lost in my glee (which has now turned into panic and dread) about the 2010 Auburn Tigers is the fact my Atlanta Falcons are also in first place and looking like a real Super Bowl contender. with Atlanta taking care of Tampa Bay and giving themselves a little breathing room...not to mention the fact the 3 toughest games on their schedule (Ravens, Packers, Saints) are ALL at home. at 6-2, it's hard to imagine that Atlanta finishes worse then 10-6 with a wild card spot...but with games against the Rams, Seahawks, Panthers (twice) and those home games (where the Falcons have been nearly unbeatable) 12-4/ the divsion title/ and a 1st round bye is a very real chance. hell, 12-4 might just get you best record in the NFC this year...and if Atlanta wants to make it to the Super Bowl then they NEED homefield advantage. there's no way i want to see Atlanta taking a trip to New York or Philly for the NFC title game, because that sort of thing normally ends ugly for the Dirty Birds.

at the beginning of the year i thought Atlanta would win the division...but my optimism usually turns to shit once i see the Falcons play a few times. i thought losing to the Steelers in overtime (minus Rapey Cocklessburger) was a sign of bad things to come, but the Birds have been pretty solid ever since. the sluggish game vs the 49ers and the ass kicking by the Eagles aside, this team looks just as Super Bowl ready as anyone else in the NFC. they've got an elite wide receiver, a great tandem of running backs, a good/tough offensive line, a defense that can get after the QB, and Matt Ryan, although not putting up the MVP type numbers i was hoping for) is a solid quarterback.

a little bit more about Matt Ryan. my belief that he was going to be the next guy to join the elite ranks of NFL QBs had died down a good bit, i'm more of the opinion now that he's better than MOST starters in the NFL. if i'm giving him a fair ranking then i'd put him around number 10 in the league, right now. Peyton, Brady, Brees, Big Ben, and Rivers being those 5 elite guys, Rodgers, Schaub, Flacco, Sanchez, and Eli being all closer to his level...and if i'm being totally honest, i think i'd take Ryan over any of those next level guys (besides maybe Rodgers).

my team spent 200k on a national title chance and all we got was this lousy probation

it feels like i'm the only Auburn blogger on the internet today

please ignore this sad bastard rant as it was made under the influence of drugs and sorrow.


after the twitter rumors hit that the NCAA was set to suspend Newton this afternoon (rumors that were later shot down) it made me long for the days of Tuberville. yeah, the dude couldn't get shit out of his offenses, but cheating was never an issue. sometimes you don't know what you got til it's gone.

remember when 2008 was considered the Season Of DEATH? well those are gonna feel like the good ole' days when the NCAA finally drops their Nuke on the Auburn football program. After the NCAA's heavy handedness (that will probably result in the firing of everyone with even the slightest connection to this team) it could be a long dark winter from which it may take a decade or so to emerge. fuck, that'll put me in my 40s by the time Auburn will be competitive again. whatever sanctions USC got, Auburn's will be twice as bad...if not 10 fold.

at this point i don't give a shit if Newton did or didn't get paid, i just don't want the Tigers to get caught. that's really all i am asking. i could give a fuck about ethics when it's my team.

when you start to believe your team's best case scenario is that you get away with everything this season and it takes 3 years or so for the NCAA to punish you, then you know you have a warped mind.

but honestly, i just really hope it isn't true...but it's really hard to believe when bullshit just keeps rolling down the hill.

Fuck College Football.

how many more Cam Newton stories do you think will come out before the UGA game?

Mississippi State sure has a lot of unnamed sources, don't they? In all of Fox Sports, The New York Times, and ESPN's reports about Newton I've yet to see them report that John Bond admitted on a radio show that he never actually talked to Kenny Rogers...nor have they mentioned a report that charges were never brought before the Florida Student Council...or even mentioned that leaking that info was illegal. But you know, BIG STORIES, don't come with retractions when juicy gossip is more interesting.

Anyways, today's fun new info claims that the Newtons DID get paid by Auburn and talked about it on the phone. Did anyone record these conversations? Can we just stop saying "unnamed sources" and call these people what they really are? Aka Mississippi State boosters. Oh well. I guess that means Auburn is gonna be getting investigated soon.

I'm not naive enough to think none of this is true, I'm more hopeful than most of it isn't true for the sake of my college football fandom, cause I've said it to everyone I'm friends with, if Auburn gets in any major trouble and gets put on serious probation that cripples the program and has us looking at 6th place finishes in the West and never ending losing streaks vs the Tide, LSU, and UGA...well then fuck it! I'm out. There are other things in the world that I can love that also make me miserable, like women and music.

whatever

So, at this point I'm just waiting for the story to come out that says Newton runs a dog fighting ring out of his apartment....

News broke last night that when Cam was at Florida he apparently was caught cheating on tests. So he basically had the same level of commitment to school as I did at 18. How does this relate to him as Auburn's QB? It doesn't. Does it make him guilty of taking any money from Auburn? No. Does it just stir up more shit and make it even less likely that he wins the Heisman? Yeah, probably.

But really it just tells me that Urban Meyer is one sour grapes/bitter motherfucker that he doesn't have the best toy in college football to play with and he's gonna do his best to throw a monkey wrench into Auburn's season. Seriously, fuck that guy. What are the chances this story ever would've come out if he'd stayed with the Gators or gone on to play for Dan Mullen? None/zero/never. When's that brain cyst gonna kill Urban, anyways?

getting to watch the best 200K anyone ever spent, in person, was pretty rad.

my only trip to the Plains this season was last Saturday during Auburn's complete destruction of Chattanooga. getting to see Cam Newton in person (even against a lousy opponent) was a treat. he really does look like someone taught a Grizzly how to run and throw with a football in it's paw. i only have hazy memories of Bo Jackson at Auburn. most of my love for him came on Sundays and Royals games on TV...but Auburn has had plenty of great players during my lifetime that i've had to opportunity to watch live. from Brent Fullwood and Tracy Rocker, to Takeo Spikes, to Dameyune Craig, to Rudy Johnson, to Jason Campbell, Cadillac Williams, and Ronnie Brown. none of those players seemed as exciting and dominate as Cam Newton. if Auburn and Newton can stay out of NCAA trouble, and 2010 wasn't the year the program got destroyed for 200K, then i'm willing to call Cam Newton the 2nd greatest Auburn football player behind Bo. And if Newton can take us to the promised land and a BCS championship then i'm willing to give him #1 in my heart...even if we only have him for a year.

I'll be at the Auburn game this weekend.

well i picked an interesting week to make my first trip to Auburn this year.


if you see me, this offer stands.

I blame Marvin Austin, The New York Times, ESPN, Bammers, A Talking Snake, and Scientology

so yeah, what was looking like a great season quickly turned into another reason why i fucking hate the media, bloggers, being a fan, pro sports, the NCAA, greed, and humans.

if Auburn is guilty then what can you say? fuck it. i'm fucking done with college football. i have other interests and rooting for Auburn has always been more about having something to talk to with my dad than anything else. my dad likes movies too. we can talk about that.

if the Newtons did nothing wrong, then yeah this is just another reason for me to hate ESPN (yes i get that they are just reporting a story. i am not an idiot, just an irrational human being like everyone else). oh yeah...just for the hell of it, screw Orson.

at this point all i care about is beating Georgia and Alabama. no matter what happens in the aftermath. i hope the team can rally around Cam and kick some ass the rest of November.

being a college football fan is a stupid and pointless task sometimes. i'm just glad i'm too dead inside for this to ruin my day.

i think noted murderer and church burner, Varg, sums up my feelings best.


hey, at least the McRib is back.

Fucking Hell

Well Bama fans are having a good night, I'm sure. This has been a crappy week. the local elections already had me down and now this. Ugghh.

I guess the main concern is did Auburn do anything wrong? My guess/hope would be no. Noone at Auburn gave Cam Newton any money and so the chance of being put on probation isn't an option. If that isn't the case and he was paid...WELL I GUESS I'M GOING TO JUST PRETEND COLLEGE FOOTBALL DOESN'T EXIST ANYMORE.

The 2nd concern is if Newton will be declared ineligible after some kind of NCAA investigation. Which wouldn't seem likely to come during the season, which means we've still got our best player for the rest of the year.

I've already assumed Newton would go pro after the season and with this cloud now hanging over his head it seems 99% more likely.

All in all this fucking sucks because even if Cam did nothing wrong this is going to be a story that is a distraction for the rest of the year and could end Newton's chances of winning the Heisman as well as hurt Auburn in the polls thanks to self righteous sport writers ready to convict a player and a team before any facts can be proven.

In the end; FUCK MISSISSIPPI STATE! and Urban Meyer.

Polls Polls Polls

Auburn may not have the respect of the Sportswriters who are obssessed with giving Boise State their title show, but thankfully Hal 9000 and his soulless computer brethern know our Tigers are #1. And being a soulless machine myself, Auburn remains at the top of my pointless blog poll.

A Lifetime of Defeats Top 25

1. Auburn
2. Oregon
3. Alabama
4. TCU
5. Boise State
6. Utah
7. Nebraska
8. Wisconsin
9. Standford
10. LSU
11. Ohio State
12. Oklahoma
13. Arizona
14. Missouri
15. Arkansas
16. South Carolina
17. Iowa
18. Michigan State
19. Mississippi State
20. Oklahoma State
21. Baylor
22. Virginia Tech
23. NC State
24. FSU
25. Oregon State

not that my poll matters...

A Lifetime of Defeats Top 25

1. Auburn Motherfucking Tigers
2. Oregon
3. Boise State
4. TCU
5. Missouri
6. Alabama
7. Michigan State
8. LSU
9. Utah
10. Oklahoma
11. Nebraska
12. Wisconsin
13. Arkansas
14. South Carolina
15. Ohio State
16. Who cares?
17. Who cares?
18. Who cares?
19. Mississippi State
20. Who cares?
21. Who cares?
22. Who cares?
23. Who cares?
24. Baylor
25. Navy

WE'RE #1 IN YOUR FLAWED FUCKING COMPUTER SYSTEM

Auburn finds themselves the new #1 team in the country in the only poll that means shit, the BCS. So yeah, my anxiety level for Auburn's trip to Oxford this weekend is going to be skyhigh. I almost feel like Auburn's being set up to fail. I would've been happy with #2 and let. Oregon deal with that big target on their back when they go to Southern Cal on Saturday. But yeah, whatever, being #1 feels awesome. The BCS system is amazingly flawed, but if Auburn somehow makes it to the national championship, you won't hear me complaining about it anymore. Well, not this year anyways.

Some quick thoughts after week 8.
-Cam Newton is the greatest Auburn football player since Bo Jackson. If he wins us a national championship I am seriously considering getting a tattoo of a laptop with the #2 on it being carried by an Eagle...and under that eagle will be Urban Meyer looking up tearfully wishing he still owned the laptop. (This is the sortqa thought pattern the enters one's mind after several beers and a pot brownie or 5.
-Michael Dyer is going to be fucking awesome to watch these next couple of years. When Cam jumps to the NFL and breaks all our hearts we can at least take comfort in the fact we are gonna have the best runningback in the SEC next season.
-I really hope the Falcons draft Nick Fairley.

3 (real) games left. The one that worries me the most is vs. those suddenly dangerous looking Dawgs. But no looking ahead because this is soooo the kind of game Houston Nutt is known for fucking up his opponent's dreams. I don't care if Auburn wins by 2 points or 200 next week, just survive and move on.

I Believe? Sorta.

my eyes are still fucking bleeding from that scoring orgy. that was like watching a game of Madden between me and my old roomate. you just knew the 1st team to commit a turnover was gonna lose because punting wasn't really in the playbook.

so yeah Auburn dropped a million points on Arkansas. awesome. stoked. but they also gave up half a million points in the process and were helped out a good deal on some questionable replay calls. i feel great about the win, in that Auburn won, but i am still not 100% sure i can believe in this team...but that's sort of been my approach to the 2010 Auburn Tigers all season. i went into the year saying we would win 10 games and go to the Capital One Bowl. and up til now i STILL believe that will happen at the very least. the words BCS Champs didn't and still haven't entered my brain. when your team's defense is that fucking shitty and you are that reliant on 1 guy (aka Newton) then it's just hard to see how we can keep possibly beating good teams.

but then there is the part of my brain that says, fuck that! we are totally going undefeated, winning the national title, cam newton is winning the Heisman, kiss our asses, we are the champs!!!

but i really don't let that come out too much, mostly i am still cautious of this squad. every week i tell my friend Mike (a noted Alabama fan) that the Tigers are gonna lose this week. i say things like, "well if i HAD to pick a loss, then i'm okay with this one." but with LSU, that is not the case. going into the year i had 4 games ranked in order of how bad i wanted Auburn to win. they were UGA, LSU, BAMA, & Arkansas...in that order. but i just can't let myself believer Auburn can win them all. call it 32 years of rooting for a team that always seems to screw themselves or get screwed at some point in the year. i'm just not comfortable thinking my team is a champion (you can obviously blame the Braves, Falcons, and Hawks for my pessimistic attitude towards fandom).

but i WANT to believe in Auburn. i NEED to believe in Auburn....because i think we can all be totally honest with ourselves and say that THIS IS THE BEST CHANCE AUBURN IS GOING TO GET AT A BCS TITLE ANYTIME SOON. i know you guys are all thinking it.

THE AUBURN TIGERS 2011 DOOMSDAY SCENARIO:

next year Auburn is going to be minus our two best defensive players in Josh Bynes and Nick Fairley (so gone to the NFL) plus a number of other valuable members of the trash heap that can't stop anything. we might be looking at a bunch of freshmen and sophomores out their getting lit up next year.

we also will have to replace 4 out of 5 offensive linemen with a bunch of redshirt freshmen, junior college transfers, and guys converted to linemen...not exactly something that has me sleeping easy.

ole' Gustav is so fucking gone after this year that it makes me wanna cry. with the way he turned Auburn from a laughing stock offensively in the SEC to one of the top 5 units in the country, there is no fucking way he's sticking around 1 more season. besides Jim Harbaugh, he's probably gonna be the hottest coach in the country. and

if we lose him, do you really think Cam Newton might just take that leap to the NFL while his stock is up? i do. and so we go into '11 with the option of Barrett Trotter (who can't seem to stay healthy) or Clint Mosely (who was a 3 star recruit) or a true freshman.

not to mention we must replace our field goal kicker, will have serious lack of depth at tailback, and likely might lose Darvin Adams a year early to the draft. all in all if 2010 doesn't have a championship at the end of the tunnel, i'm not sure another is likely for at least another 3 or 4 years.

so no pressure Tigers, but YOU HAVE TO WIN NOW.

It's My Motherfucking Poll and I Will Blindly Rank My Team #1

A Lifetime of Defeats Top 25

1. Auburn (who needs a fucking defense?)
2. Oregon
3. Oklahoma
4. Boise State
5. TCU
6. LSU
7. Alabama
8. Utah
9. Michigan State
10. Oklahoma State
11. Missouri
12. Stanford
13. Wisconsin
14. Ohio State
15. Nebraska
16. FSU
17. Arizona
18. Arkansas
19. Iowa
20. Texas
21. West Virginia
22. Virginia Tech
23. Mississippi State
24. USC
25. South Carolina

So long, Bobby Cox

Even though I mostly don't care about/and or like baseball anymore (which is always weird to think about considering I played it half of my life) I will always root for the Braves. And after spending my youth rooting for the most useless franchise in the majors, Bobby Cox came in and turned the laughing stock into a perennial contender. For all the shit people give Atlanta for only winning 1 championship how many teams wouldn't give anything to have that problem? I think the Cubs would trade us for that kind of failure anytime.

So thank you, Bobby. Thank you for making the Atlanta Braves something that made me miserable instead of something I didn't give a shit about.

SEC Backlash?

In what kind of bizzaro world would you imagine there being 2 undefeated SEC schools at the midway point in the season who would BOTH be ranked lower than a school from the WAC & Mountain West? You'd think 4 straight BCS titles for the conference would earn a little more love for Auburn and LSU...but I get the sneaky feeling that there's not going to be an SEC program representing the league in the title game this year. I am starting to think voters wanna see anyone but a school from the deep south holding that crystal football...even if it means Ohio State gets to face off against the Boise State Smurfs in a battle of undefeated schools who didn't beat anyone worth a shit.

All I've heard this year is how the Big 10 is back and how the Pac 10 has more talent top to bottom than the SEC. It's like a bogus political mantra being repeated week after week on College Gameday until the voters start to believe it. Sure, Georgia and Tennesse both suck, but does that really mean the whole conference is down? LSU is the luckiest team in the history of ever....but a win is a win is a win. South Carolina finds themselves a legit contender but I still get the feeling noone believes in the 'Cocks. And Auburn might just be the quietest undefeated SEC team with a Heisman contender of all time.

All I can say is if Auburn somehow is able to win the SEC and has to settle for a Sugar Bowl while Boise and OSU duke it out for the national championship, I might just drive to Idaho and set the blue turf on fire.

Poll Damn Eagle

take a mental picture, friends. Auburn finds themselves the top ranked SEC team at the midway point. hopefully it lasts. the fact Bama is still ranked higher than the Gamecocks is kinda lame, but i don't bow down to the AP and Coaches and so my top 25 goes as so...


A Lifetime of Defeats Top 25

1. Oregon
2. Ohio State
3. Nebraska
4. Boise State
5. Oklahoma
6. Auburn
7. TCU
8. LSU
9. South Carolina
10. Alabama
11. Arkansas
12. Utah
13. Stanford
14. Michigan State
15. Oklahoma State
16. Missouri
17. FSU
18. Nevada
19. Arizona
20. Iowa
21. Wisconsin
22. Air Force
23. West Fucking Virginia
24. Florida
25. North Carolina State

Top 25

A Lifetime of Defeat's Top 25

1. Alabama
2. Oregon
3. Ohio State
4. Boise State
5. Nebraska
6. TCU
7. Auburn
8. Oklahoma
9. LSU
10. Arkansas
11. Arizona
12. Utah
13. Florida
14. Michigan State
15. Miami
16. Iowa
17. Stanford
18. Michigan
19. South Carolina
20. Wisconsin
21. Nevada
22. Oklahoma State
23. Missouri
24. Northwestern
25. Air Force

Perfect Weekend

Auburn Rolls

The Falcons win in comeback fashion to go to 3-1.

& the Braves sneak into the playoffs in Bobby Cox final year.

oh yeah, AND the Georgia Bulldogs fucking suck.

awesome.

as a bonus the weather is FINALLY of the light jacket wearing variety, therefor worth going outside again.

Top 25.... 1 month down

A Lifetime of Defeats Top 25

1. Alabama
2. Oregon
3. Ohio State
4. TCU
5. Boise State
6. Nebraska
7. Florida
8. Wisconsin
9. Auburn
10. Stanford
11. LSU
12. Arizona
13. Oklahoma
14. Arkansas
15. Utah
16. South Carolina
17. Miami
18. USC
19. Iowa
20. Texas
21. Missouri
22. Michigan
23. Nevada
24. Oklahoma State
25. North Carolina State

Camzilla For Heisman

where the hell is Cam Newton’s Heisman love? dude is easily the best player in the SEC right now. he’s single handedly beaten Clemson and South Carolina (with a little help from Dyer and the Defense).

sure Denard Robinson is exciting and Andrew Luck has NFL #1 pick written all over him, but beating Notre Dame isn't exactly the most difficult thing in the world to do…but then again Sportswriters tend to be a lazy bunch. Newton is one of the most dangerous player in college football right now....give him some love damnit!

4-0 and ranked in the top 10 BABY!!!!

soooo. 2 schools from the state of South Carolina, multiple heart attacks, 897,000 uses of the word FUCK, and a whole lot of pretending that i wasn't gonna let myself get swept up in the Cam Newton hype....and we find our Auburn Tigers battle tested like a motherfucker. nothing has come easy for Auburn these last 2 (hell, really 3 weeks) but Auburn has figured out a way to win. 2 BIG comebacks against teams that'll more than likely be playing in bowl games shows that this ain't your Tommy Tuberville Tigers that tended to fold up the tent whenever they fell behind more than a touchdown. No, starting with last year's West Virginia comeback, this is a team that will not panic and just give up. they will fight their asses off and do whatever it takes to get the win. Do i really think Auburn is gonna challenge Alabama for the West this season? yeah, i fucking do. so with Auburn's remaining schedule there are only 3 real games that i don't see Auburn favored. Arkansas, LSU, and Alabama. LSU's offense is a broken down piece of shit. Arkansas will be a real test, Mallett is the real deal and those receivers scare me...but do you really think Arkansas can stop Auburn's running game? Me neither. and Auburn almost beat the Tide last seasons with a far less talented squad. if Auburn rolls into the Iron Bowl with a chance to claim the West title then all bets are off...i don't give a shit how fucking scary Bama looks.

Top 25

A Lifetime of Defeats Top 25

1. Alabama
2. Oregon
3. Ohio State
4. Nebraska
5. TCU
6. Boise State
7. Texas
8. Florida
9. Arkansas
10. Wisconsin
11. Arizona
12. South Carolina
13. Stanford
14. Oklahoma
15. LSU
16. Auburn
17. Utah
18. Miami
19. Iowa
20. West Virginia
21. USC
22. Michigan
23. Nevada
24. Missouri
25. Oklahoma State

music for the drunk and lonely. the best kind.

another Walkmen album. another record to get me through the winter. the most consistent band of the early 2000s New York indie boom has put out Lisbon today, probably their best album since Bows & Arrows (although to be honest i love all of them about the same). how these guys haven’t been more successful has always been of one of the great mysteries of the last decade. the Walkmen have done nothing to fuck up their young Dylan fronting a british post-punk band sound because smart bands don’t fuck with what works. if you are a fan then you will like it. if you aren’t a fan...well what the fuck is wrong with you?

When Men Were Gods

Who had time to burn a Quran this weekend with all that awesome football?

the best thing about the opening Sunday of the 2010 NFL season were those Ray Lewis Old Spice Commercials.

some other shit we learned:

Arian Foster is apparently a better NFL runningback than he was at Tennessee.

Darren McFadden CAN put up descent numbers for your fantasy football team as long as he's on your bench.

Vince Young is a better QB than any of the other guys drafted the same year as him.

No matter how much i want to believe in the Falcons, there only true purpose on Earth is to make me suffer.

Even when the Lions really win, they still end up with a loss.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT! Mike Williams is alive and scoring touchdowns in the NFL?!!?

That dog killer can still play some football, a little bit. (on a side note, how sick are you gonna be of hearing about the Quarterback controversy in Philly that ESPN is gonna ram down our throats all fucking season?)

Tony Romo is still overrated.

Thank Odin, God, and Allah that the NFL has returned.

my vintage 1986 NFL Pro Bowl t-shirt. who owns a fucking Pro Bowl t-shirt? apparently this asshole does.

5 predictions for the NFL Season (that have nothing to do with the Falcons)

1. The Houston Texans will finally unseat the Colts in the AFC South

2. The Raiders will win 8 games.

3. Brett Favre will get hurt and actually miss a game this year, snapping his streak.

4. CJ Spiller is gonna win the NFL Rookie of the Year.

5. The Jets are NOT going to make it to the Super Bowl

i have this weird feeling it's gonna be 2007 all over again

The next time you are bitching and whining about the way your team WON a game, stop and reflect on a team like Virginia Tech losing to James Madison.


A Lifetime of Defeats Top 25

1. Alabama
2. Ohio State
3. Oregon
4. Nebraska
5. Oklahoma
6. Florida
7. Texas
8. TCU
9. Boise State
10. Iowa
11. Wisconsin
12. Auburn
13. Arkansas
14. South Carolina
15. Arizona
16. Utah
17. Stanford
18. Michigan
19. Miami
20. Houston
21. Air Force
22. California
23. LSU
24. USC
25. West Virginia

Sound & Vision

a random selection of awesome rock and roll pics via my other blog.

That Was Ugly, But I'll Take It

with a lot of help from CamZilla, Auburn was able to beat those suddenly dangerous Cowbell ringing fools in Starkville and escape with a lucky 17-14 win. Newton, McCalebb, and Dyer were the offensive stars again and it looks like if the Tigers are gonna make any noise in the West this year it's gonna be on the legs of those two.

and HEY, looks like we kind of have a defense...sort of. Nick Fairley is turning into the defensive line beast that we knew we'd need to replace Coleman with. how many sacks does he have this season? like 12? other than the long drive to start the 2nd half and when the special teams fucked them on that fumble, Auburn's defense was able to keep State off the scoreboard. still there are too many yards being given up to think Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina, and even LSU won't be lighting it up.

but in the SEC a win is a win is a win, these days...so now it's time to get ready for some real tests with Clemson and South Carolina coming up next.


a confession:

you know, at almost no point in the game did i think Auburn was ACTUALLY gonna win this thing. i always love it when the Tigers prove me wrong. in the past this sort of performance against Mississippi State would've made me sick...but i feel like the Bulldogs are for real and will end up with a 7-5 record and an upset against LSU or Arkansas. I'm def not looking forward to Dan Mullen down in Starkville these next few seasons until he gets scooped up by some bigger program.

Fuck Thursday Night Football In It's Ear

my anxiety meter for tonight's Auburn/Mississippi State Thursday Night Black Hole Of ESPN Doom is about as high as it could possibly be. from the moment this game was announced i was screaming "Upset!" inside my brain.

Why do Elite schools(and by elite i just mean team's with a ton of tradition/years of winning/not members of the Big East) ever fucking play on Thursday? why would you give up a Saturday game for some extra eyeballs on ESPN? is it really that great of a recruiting tool? is it really worth playing that game and losing? i understand that team's in the Big East built up their brand by playing this time slot...and it helped those schools...but Auburn is hardly West Virginia, South Florida, or Louisville. anyways it's too late now, but i really wish the Tigers would avoid this game at all costs. i can't remember Florida, LSU, Tennessee, Georgia, or Alabama playing on Thursday. no, it's always South Carolina or Vandy. is that the company we wanna be keeping?

Former USC Running Back To Be Stripped Of His Giant Useless Paperweight aka Heisman

it took them long enough. wait, not that one? really?


seriously taking Reggie Bush's Heisman trophy away might be the stupidest/most pointless thing that has ever happened in college football...and THAT is saying something.

According to ESPN it's Michael Dyer's Show At Auburn

can't link to the post, but basically the true freshman is getting an elevated role in the offense this week, which is to be expected considering he easily looked like the best runningback for the Tigers.

1st week polls out.

in the polls that matter Auburn remains in the 20s. the AP has the Tigers ranked 21st and the Coaches put Auburn in a tie for 20 with Utah.

The Admiral Would've Warned Houston Nutt That It Was A Trap

one of my favorite moments from a rather excellent 1st weekend of college football was the Ole' Miss/Admiral Ackbar commercial.

1 Week Down

just in case you were wondering...yes, Nike does want to rape your eyeballs.

A Lifetime of Defeat's Top 25

1. Alabama
2. Oregon
3. Ohio State
4. Miami
5. Boise State
6. Nebraska
7. Texas
8. TCU
9. Oklahoma
10. Florida
11. Georgia
12. Virginia Tech
13. Auburn
14. Florida State
15. Arkansas
16. Iowa
17. Georgia Tech
18. Wisconsin
19. Penn State
20. Arizona
21. USC
22. BYU
23. Utah
24. West Virginia
25. LSU

The Cam Newton Show, Starring Cam Newton as Super QB

So yeah, that was fun to watch....well the Cam Newton parts anyways. Hmmm, when's the last time you felt 100% confident about the guy taking snaps for Auburn? For me it would be Jason Campbell midway through his Senior season.
You've got to consider Newton one of the top 3 QBs in the SEC, don't you? Watching him it looks like someone gave a young grizzly bear a lesson in how to play football and put him out on the field. He's a monster! He's awesome! He's ours! Thanks Florida.

I wonder after yesterday if Urban Meyer is missing ole' Cam after the performance his Gators put on?

So yeah, Cameron Newton worship will probably be the main theme of yesterday's blowout victory...and it should be, BUT you don't name your blog A Lifetime of Defeats because you have a positive outlook on life.

And so I am here to bitch and whine about the performance of Auburn yesterday in a game where they dropped over 50 points.

And where to start....

1. THE DEFENSE = still just as shitty as last season. Auburn can't fucking stop the run. Auburn can't stop the pass. Any team with a good QB will shred us apart. Any team with a good running game will gash us for 200 yards. It's a good thing that Auburn has a good offense because I have a feeling the average score of their victories is going to be in the 35 to 28 realm.

2. FUMBLES = Mario Fannin is a real good receiver coming out of the backfield (as was obvious from his 2 touchdowns) which is why they should just move him back to H-Back fulltime. Because he CAN NOT BE TRUSTED to hang on to a motherfucking football. 1 fumble does not a season make, but his history of this has always been the reason he's been beat out by guys that he was seemingly more athletic and skilled than.

But seriously, after watching little Dyer play yesterday is there any doubt in your mind that he shouldn't be the starting tailback? Because I see a guy who could win a Heisman someday. Watching Newton and Dyer together was by far the most exciting thing about the Tigers offense. Give me more of that right now.

So yeah, Newton's performance is the reason to feel good about 2010 but the defense is gives us every reason to feel like the 2010 Tigers are going to be a team that drives me completely fucking insane. I'm stoked.

It's That Time Again

broke out my unlucky Auburn shirt today (every game i've ever worn this to the Tigers have lost...so any games i attend this year i will be leaving this at home.)

as you may have been able to tell by the complete lack of football related (or anything related, really) posts on A Lifetime Of Defeats the past several months that i really have lost complete and total interest in this blog. with any luck the Tigers will have a great season and i'll get the urge to write some more...but right now i could honestly give a fuck about this blog. so yeah, if you've been following it the past few years then thanks a lot. but my anger and profanity is lacking of late.